THE FAREWELL OF LOVE

There are two pains of love. The first one is when the relationship ends and we, following the breakup, have to get used to the absence of the other person, with the feeling of rejection and the lack of perspective, but since we are still so involved, we cannot see light at the end of the tunnel. The second pain is when we start to glimpse the light at the end of the tunnel.

You must think I am drunken. If the light is being seen, then we can say goodbye to pain, wouldn't it be so? Yes, more or less. There are, as I said, two pains. The most heartbreaking is the physical pain of the lack of kisses and hugs---the pain of becoming unimportant to the loved one. But when this pain passes, we begin another farewell ritual: the pain of abandoning the love we felt. The pain of emptying the heart, of removing longing, of being free, without special feeling for anyone. It hurts too.

In fact, we are attached to love as much as to the person who generated it. A lot of people complain about not being able to let go of someone. It's just that without taking care of it, they don't want to let it go. That love, even if not reciprocated, has become a souvenir of a beautiful time that was lived, became an invaluable asset, is a feeling to which we cling. It's a part of our existence. We want, of course, to be cheerful and available again, but for this, we need to give up something that was dear to us for a long time, that in some way has entered us and that only with a lot of effort is it possible to let it go. It's a milder, almost imperceptible pain.

Maybe that's why it usually lasts longer than elbow pain itself. It's a pain that confuses us. It seems to be that same pain first, but it's already another one. The person who left us no longer interests us, but interests the love we felt for them, that love that justified us as human beings, that put us within statistics: I love, then I exist.

To say goodbye to love is to say goodbye to yourself. It is the end of a story that ended, externally, without our agreement, but that also needs to get out of us.

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THE FAREWELL OF LOVE

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