Imperceptibility

I am shortening my conversations more and more often.
I am less and less interested in who, when and why said words they will regret, but it will be too late.
I am silent for longer and longer, before the frothing words of a friend who later becomes a stranger to me.
It's one thing to hear the truth, it's another to wonder how I earned that tone.

I sift through what wounds me,
learning from what is done to me to teach myself.
I understand the difference between loving and 'I'm fine with you.'
I step forward faster and faster, indifferent to the eyes I once trusted.
Increasingly, I am not answering phone calls.
Because those who seek me today,
they allowed themselves to disappear from me when I was once searching for them.

The deeper I wade into the summer of my years, the more convinced I grow that my friends will thin
at the cost of all those who managed to slip into my world for a while, and then I chose to forget for a long time.
Because man does not change, but reveals himself.

Before those who don't believe you care about them,
Where there is you for someone, and they find you...
With a word. A call. A letter. A flower.
With a card from which only one painted smile glows.
I say goodbye to the rest.
Slowly and slowly.
Almost without trace.