Yet I will love you still

 
I am here… as I am, in my own way.
Apart from missing you sometimes,
there's no other restlessness within me.
You could say I'm well enough with my own work.


Some of your posts pull at me deeply.
Some of your words carry such tenderness…
I don't know why I read them again and again.
The next moment I wonder: are you like your writing?
…Here I pause and stop.


The other day, hearing a little of what I said, not all of it…
you've gone and imagined so many things your own way.
Know this: to belittle or dismiss you—
such a thing never even enters my imagination.


Still, even by mistake of heart… for hurting you,
I ask forgiveness. I plead with you,
don't twist the meaning of anything I say… anymore.


I respect you from my heart,
under no circumstance is hurting you my intention.
Thinking of this as the first and last time… forgive me.
If you don't wish it… there will be no more meetings or words between us.


Don't stay annoyed with yourself, don't stay angry.
If you feel like scolding me wildly or writing something terrible,
do it right now, get it over with. Satisfy all the rage in your heart.
Even so… be yourself again. Keep me in your forgiveness, I ask.


……………………………………………………
……………………………………………………


Hey you! You're such a stubborn boy.
An idiot, a fool, and so much more!
You're hurting me so much. What's your problem?
You won't answer when I call, you don't call either. And you won't even block me!


I want to hear you—how many more ways must I make you understand?


I don't know how many more days you'll keep me waiting like this.
Still, I will always want you so much!
I'll want you for your own sake… I'll want you to keep you well.


I will love you terribly, terribly, terribly, and then…
one day without a word I'll disappear… somewhere far away.
And even there… I will love only you!