With eyes held to the morning past

 One.
 It felt good. The feeling grew. Love came.
 Everything begins this way, doesn't it? Tell me?
 If this body of mine were a lamp
 beside your altar,
 burning myself to give you light—
 that's how I'd love you.
  
 Do you hear this voice?
 Today silence has fallen asleep.
 Loneliness? Even that has fled!
 No sorrow remains, no tale of tears...
 because you are here!
 Don't you understand?
 These ribs you see—they are your dwelling,
 so many words spoken alone...
 Alone? Where? You are here!
 This ocean of breath—is it mine?
 It's yours too!
 You took everything! Then why didn't you take me?
  
 They've named fire "peaceful sky"!
 Touch that blue current of the upper sea,
 dive deep into this heart and wander through chambers of fire,
 let them say what they will...
 I say,
 the modern name for primordial desire is love,
 the formal name for longing is love,
 the name for nectar on lips is love,
 the name for our union is love.
  
 Today, even at spring's end, eternal spring sways,
 in the heart awakens a turbulent flood of feeling,
 waves of apocalypse rise in agitated veins,
 all the buds that were have bloomed into red flowers
 for you alone!
  
 When you feel even a little pain, it strikes terrible in this chest,
 ever since you settled still within my heart,
 these ribs have been so hungry!
 They long to hear your call,
 don't stay silent any longer,
 wake me and call out as you go,
 dig up from death and rise,
 into this courtyard, this moonlight
 on such a night.
  
 Two.
 Sometimes, one morning, all those long-lost mornings
 gather in tangles near my head...
 Those who left so long ago
 or disappeared just yesterday...
 Nothing is truly lost, everything returns!
  
 When they come close, it feels so good,
 I talk with them,
 if some sulking or angry past comes back with puffed cheeks,
 I ask laughing, "Hey, what's up? Tell me, how are you? Is that anger still fresh?"
 It says nothing, only smiles.
  
 That morning when fierce storms made everything chaotic
 returns today—how calm... I can barely recognize it!
 That morning that passed in terrible weeping and pain
 returns with a flash of laughter to tell me, "I'm doing just fine!"
 I see one old morning sitting quiet in white dew, just as before!
 Another morning says nothing—just keeps staring silently
 while sad eyes speak continuously...
 It takes ears to hear sound, but heart to hear silence,
 so I give all my hearing a rest right now.
  
 Morning comes, morning goes...
 After some time they too return,
 yet they never become "nothing,"
 they always remain in some corner of the unconscious,
 returning when called with eager heart.
  
 Tell me, why do they stay?
 Don't they have anywhere to go?
 Do they really remain?
 Just like this... noon blazes, afternoon slips away, evening falls,
 night's shadow lies down on that path.
  
 Three.
 I don't know why you've decided
 my wanting is just a bit too much!
 How many desires hidden behind you
 turn stale before their time!
 You don't keep track!
 Only one desire remains,
 when rain touches this heart,
 the heart says, let me soak you!
  
 You fool! Don't be afraid!
 That monsoon doesn't come,
 perhaps it never will!
 The twelve-month rain of the mind—in its salty showers
 I soak you daily through heart's vision, mind's sight!
  
 Four.
 Doubt says,
 look around!
 In this life
 so much happiness
 is wrapped up
 in tender love,
 then why do you run madly
 searching for more happiness?
 The one who never forgets you even for a moment,
 why do you weep for him in vain like an ocean?
  
 Let me tell you then, listen,
 is running ever easy?
 Only happiness never cheats,
 trying to pour out happiness's water
 I complete my bath in other happiness!
  
 When happiness's water is blue,
 I completely forget the red,
 drowning in yellow
 I forget green.
 I stand before the mirror,
 applauding myself—
 "See how I lost white and clear
 in black water!"
 And so it goes on...
  
 Otherwise tell me, the desert you've kept for me
 —harsh and terrible, utterly dry—
 how do I survive even there!
  
 Five.
 Oh yes, listen!
 This happiness though
 is no happiness at all!
 Remove this happiness's mask and see,
 you'll be pained!
 If I call it by the name 'pain'
 life becomes so monotonous,
 so I call it by a new name—
 'happiness'!
  
 I've heard that the brain
 responds even to fake laughter!
 So I turn 'pain' into 'happiness,'
 hoping
 that maybe
 the pains will laugh
 sometimes by mistake of the heart...
 happiness's laughter!
  
 Six.
 Even unwillingly
 don't give those false things anymore,
 life passes in fake emotions... truly, it doesn't feel good.
 Don't say out of obligation good morning, afternoon or night...
 Here... stop! What obligation do you have anyway?
 I don't understand!
 The one who loves has the obligation! Why you?
  
 You know anyway
 how false they are!
 Fool though I am, I know too.
 If you give me false emotion—android-like,
 in some mistaken moment I think
 they are real!
 Yet I know,
 how consciously false they are every moment!
  
 Don't spend them, save your words!
 Words are very precious, you know?
 Don't throw them at me
 falsely! Why do you remind me again and again
 that you have nothing to say!
 Never did, I know.
 And why should there be anything?
 Isn't that right?
 ...Are you happy now?
  
 Now I know, I knew before too!
 Yet all the feelings inside—so shameless!
 That fixed truth
 would swallow lies laughingly
 for its own convenience,
 how happy it was! Bunch of fools!
 This world is truly strange!