What Work Taught Me / Part One

(Disclaimer. The views expressed in this essay emerge from my own experience. Different opinions and experiences are entirely possible. Therefore, none of my statements should be taken as set rules or universal truths. I've discussed various techniques here, many of which I cannot always follow myself. More importantly, I do not personally endorse many aspects of this essay. I have written quite candidly what I have observed and learned from others. I would welcome your sharing your own experiences or opinions in the comments—it would benefit both me and other readers.)


There are no hard-and-fast rules for avoiding professional troubles, but I've discussed some techniques for minimizing them here. You'll need to customize these according to your situation and judgment. I advise against taking any of this as gospel. Many of these techniques were learned from our respected senior officers. Some I gleaned from reading various writings by former civil servants. Thus, much of this is not original. I humbly express my gratitude to them all. I drafted this essay about seven years ago as lecture material for a class with the 31st BCS batch officers at our department's training academy. I later presented that same material at a training session for assistant revenue officers. I've further edited, refined, and expanded those points while keeping myself completely objective to create this current piece. I had no intention of ever publishing this—I don't know what possessed me to want to share it now, but here we are. Another thing: I gained this experience working in the Bangladesh Customs environment—I've never held any other job. So naturally there will be errors in my knowledge and understanding. I humbly request that you view my mistakes with a forgiving eye.


There are four types of officers in the civil service: first, HE (Honest and Efficient); second, DE (Dishonest but Efficient); third, HI (Honest but Inefficient); fourth, DI (Dishonest and Inefficient). Which type you'll become depends on which type would make you happy. Nobody truly loses sleep over your honesty or dishonesty, as long as you can manage everything properly and get things done without creating unnecessary complications. Don't expect any special reward for your honesty—the peace of mind you get from being honest is reward enough. Honesty or dishonesty—it's a choice, not a rule. There isn't a single civil service system in our region that stands on one hundred percent honesty. A system being corruption-free doesn't mean the system is perfect. The ideal state would be this: let there be some flaws in the system, some irregularities, but let the system be one hundred percent capable of delivering services quickly and correctly. Someone who is honest but also incompetent at work is useless. Such passive honesty serves no purpose for the country. And if you can find someone who is both honest and skilled at work, then there's nothing more to say—such a person is respected by everyone, both in service and beyond! They bring great benefit to the country and its people. Those who are simultaneously dishonest and incompetent shouldn't have jobs at all! If we could actually push them out of their posts and send them home, it would greatly benefit the country. And if someone is dishonest to a "tolerable degree" but highly skilled at work, you get much more output from such an employee. The system and reality often force one to be dishonest or tolerate dishonesty. Note that when we talk about honesty, most of us only understand financial honesty. Actually, honesty means much more than that. Doing work on time, arriving at the office punctually, having consistency between words and actions, showing maximum sincerity toward commitments, managing the office properly, being humane—all of this falls under honesty. To learn more about this, you might read former bureaucrat Dr. Akbar Ali Khan's "The Economics of Altruism."


You must know and understand the law. What does this mean? It means you need to know where the law is located. A good lawyer is he who knows rather where the law is than what the law is. Understanding the law and its loopholes is more important than memorizing it. You'll often face situations where, willingly or unwillingly, you'll have to do many things that are not lawful, but are law-gap-ful. If you don't know the law well, how can you do such work safely (without endangering yourself or your job)? The books will be right there in front of you. Through working, you learn what's needed and what isn't. The rest is easy—understanding regulations and making decisions or seeking decisions. If you pay attention, you'll notice that the language of law is more difficult than the law itself. This was done deliberately. But why? The answer is simple. Most of these laws were created by the British. They crafted these laws in such a way that ordinary people would have difficulty understanding them, giving birth to the concept of "legal technicalities." Just as writing a recipe is harder than cooking, creating legal provisions is harder than applying the law. Moreover, most existing laws were made in the shadow and imitation of various foreign laws. Consequently, when translating into Bengali, literal rather than interpretive translation has made legal language complex—this could be another reason. To understand what law is and why it exists, you might enjoy reading Ian Morley's "The Devil's Advocate."


The rule of employment is this: the one who commits murder doesn't get hanged. The one who gets caught gets hanged. Making mistakes isn't wrong—getting caught making mistakes is the real mistake. In this country, any trivial matter can be brought before everyone through proper channels and proper procedures to make it into a major issue. Conversely, if you ignore major issues, they cease to be matters worthy of consideration. The same applies to employment. You should avoid making enemies at work if possible, though even if you're completely neutral toward everyone, many will still choose to consider you an enemy for no reason at all. They'll make you cry without cause! Some people exist everywhere who can't stand to live without stirring up trouble. At work, it's better to maintain formal relationships with everyone except those who are genuinely close to you personally. We have one boss who deliberately speaks in measured, robotic terms, calculating even when to smile. I've never seen him extremely elated or extremely dejected about anything. Interestingly, he's actually a different kind of person in reality... It's better not to open your heart to anyone unless absolutely necessary. Your own words will get you into trouble more than anything else.


You might receive your reward for doing the right thing from the Creator. But you'll certainly receive immediate punishment from your boss for doing the wrong thing. How do you know what's right or wrong work?... Time will teach you this. The strange thing is, there are many tasks here where whether they're right or wrong depends on the situation and your boss's whim. In life, there's no such thing as right or wrong—life has only two things: what happens and what doesn't happen—and certainly not in employment! What gets you into trouble is improper work; what keeps you trouble-free is proper work. The wrong work that your predecessor got away with might get you caught doing the same wrong work. Keep this in mind too. You must protect yourself from getting into trouble as much as possible—when trouble comes, you have to endure many complications that are truly painful.


If you help any stakeholder here, they'll speak well of you to their spouse, children, and family. And if you can't help them, they'll tell your boss all sorts of things about you. Here, you can become someone's enemy even without harming them. How? In three ways. If you refuse to do something because the law doesn't cover it or because doing it might get you into trouble. If someone you dislike happens to have a good relationship with them. If you cannot easily tolerate the misconduct, improper proposals, or pettiness of someone who has a very good relationship with your boss—then they too can turn you into an enemy.


Even if your boss is lame, blind, mute, and deaf, remember that they are always watching you. If you don't believe it, carelessly do something wrong and see. You'll get immediate results! Remember that your boss wants to be valued, sometimes overvalued. If you don't maintain awareness of your boss's work and knowledge, or don't try to understand when, where, and how your boss is monitoring your activities, then working won't be easy for you. Not evaluating your boss's competence is the same as shooting yourself in the foot. If your boss has any competence, tell them so to their face; if not, still tell your boss what they want to hear, even if you have to make it up. Keep your big certificates and achievements in your pocket—your boss has neither the time nor the need to care about such things. Rather, I've observed that the lighter someone's academic certificate burden, the easier it is for them to work. Bosses tend to like highly qualified employees less. You may have many qualifications, but if you can't do anything useful for your department or boss, your value is zero. Quit the job, and when you run into your boss on the street... "Hi Akkas bhai, how are you, baby?" You can say that, no problem, but working means you have shackles on your feet... so, no unnecessary attitude! And remember one more thing: never become a threat to your boss. Be careful that none of your work or behavior interferes with your boss in any way. Nobody likes a thorn in their path.


Even if you flood the country with good work and save the nation, it won't matter if that news doesn't regularly reach your boss's ears. Feedbacks are important. Remember, whether your boss knows you is far more important for you than it is for them. When you work, you'll see that some people get rewarded without working, while others get scolded despite working. Why? Whether you're working should occur to your boss, regardless of whether you're actually working or not.

There’s another important matter. It’s not enough just to do the work—what matters is whether your work pleases your superiors, whether you’re refraining from anything they might dislike. These things are crucial. Share your activities positively on Facebook. Tag your boss and write praise for them in those posts.

In this world, save for creating human beings, there’s no power that the Almighty hasn’t given to deceivers. Stay cautious of them. Let me describe some of their traits. Their behavior is excellent. They speak with great sincerity. They never lose their temper about anything. They borrow money from people with sweet words, then never return it. “My father is so-and-so, my grandfather such-and-such, my uncle this, my maternal uncle that, our family is very renowned”—they keep giving such introductions. Their patience for manipulation is infinite; no matter how hard you try, you won’t be able to make them lose their composure. Their behavior is wonderful, they never get angry, they tell various lies trying to extract your sympathy or trust. They can talk endlessly—continuously if needed—and most of it is lies. Listening to them, you’ll feel they’re about to take you to heaven right now, that they’ll do so much for you, that their life’s sorrows match your own, and so on. Unless you see them, you’ll never understand in this lifetime how convincingly one can lie. With their gentle, affable, sincere behavior, they easily win your heart. Once you’re enchanted and step into their trap, that’s it! They have less shame than street dogs. Among them is another group—when you meet them, you’ll feel they can be trusted, that you can openly share all your secret thoughts. Seeing them, talking with them, you want to embrace them; they instantly feel like your own. These are your boss’s spies. Everything you say or don’t say, they’ll exaggerate and deliver to your boss’s or some harmful colleague’s ears, in exchange for getting their own work done.

If you suddenly think the sun has risen in the west, it could happen by Allah’s command. But if you often think your service recipients and colleagues are telling the truth, then I’d tell you—working in civil service with such a simple mind will be a bit difficult for you. Day in and day out, you’ll have to live with half-truths and lies. Keep that kind of mental preparation. Don’t trust anyone, and don’t let anyone understand that you don’t trust them. The most successful workers smile and speak pleasantly with everyone, never lose their temper with anyone. If your mood turns sour, you can follow a technique: don’t speak to anyone then, remain completely silent even if you have to grit your teeth. Never speak ill of anyone behind their back. This doesn’t mean no one will speak ill of you behind your back, but gradually the number of people who believe such talk will decrease. How do you know that the person to whom you’re speaking ill of someone won’t someday threaten to expose or actually expose that conversation to extract some favor from you or someone else? As long as words remain inside your mouth, they’re an asset; once they slip out, they become a liability, because then you’ll have to bear responsibility for those words.

Whatever your colleagues, subordinates, stakeholders are saying, verify it in your own way. You’ll be held accountable for what you do, not for what they say. However, there are some bosses who have a head in name only, but actually have nothing but ears. Such bosses listen to gossip, believe it, and take action based on it. No matter how hard you try, you won’t be able to keep them away from such tendencies. In such cases, it’s better to figure out what they want and fulfill their demands. It may not always be possible to do this; in that case, there’s no option but to accept their unfair decisions or behavior and continue working. However, I’ve also seen smart officers who maintain good relationships with those who whisper in the boss’s ear. As a result, they can keep themselves largely trouble-free. Then again, I’ve seen bosses who, once they dislike someone, dislike them for life. Then whatever that person does appears bad in their eyes. They keep finding fault with that person; if there’s no fault, they discover one anyway. There’s really nothing to be done about such people. You can’t just change your boss at will, nor can you choose a boss to your liking.

There’s no point in complaining about your job. No one sent police to your house to drag you and force you into this job. If you don’t like it, quit. You’re not someone whose departure would affect anyone. No one in civil service is indispensable. Even if the world’s greatest scholar were removed from civil service, it wouldn’t harm the country or service recipients. If you feel you have a better option available, I’d tell you: go for it! And you can be certain that after you leave, your department will never miss you, hardly anyone will remember you. As long as there’s a job, there’s respect! No job, no respect. That’s the rule. You might say you don’t care about all this. The fact is, civil service doesn’t care what you care or don’t care about. Your emotions have zero value in civil service, at least. Every person lives according to their own capacity, fortune, and opportunities. You’re no exception. Your colleagues understand very well that if you could do something better than staying in civil service, you wouldn’t have stayed here!

Generally, you’ll find three types of colleagues:
Good: These are good because even if they can’t help, they don’t harm, though they try to help. Their number is very small.
Harmful: They don’t stab you in the chest, they speak sweetly, present themselves as very sincere, and stab you in the back when they get the chance. Their number is somewhat higher. They try various ways to destroy your confidence. Behave very formally with them. Don’t let yourself be influenced by anything they say.
Neither good nor harmful: They neither gossip nor praise. They stay busy with their own affairs, don’t bother anyone. Their number is the highest.
Colleagues generally don’t become friends. And unfortunately, you’ll find some friends who, after becoming colleagues, no longer remain friends. There are exceptions. The more such exceptions you can accommodate in your life, the more peacefully you’ll be able to work. We spend most of our lives with colleagues. So if we can build good relationships with them, it’s for our own comfort.

Don’t just sign whatever those you’re having work done by (office assistants, outsiders, runners, casual workers, master roll appointees, etc.) write in notes. Before sending files up, read through them yourself multiple times. Keep your eyes and ears open about them. Never let them know any of your official passwords. Sometimes they make mistakes without understanding, or intentionally do things wrong. All the world’s fraudsters and ill-natured service recipients combined couldn’t damage your reputation as much as one such harmful person. Remember, they face no risk; all the risk is yours. Working means taking responsibility for where I sign. Later, you can never say you didn’t notice it then, you signed by mistake, they rushed you into signing, etc. Don’t keep files lying around unsigned. Files aren’t your father’s property. If you’re afraid to sign files, quit your job and sit at home watching cartoons. You weren’t put in that chair to delay your service recipients’ work. Learn to make decisions; if you can’t, forward the file upward. Holding up files is a kind of crime. Whether your decision is wrong or right, make the decision. When making decisions, you must consider laws and regulations in light of your authority’s requirements. Following the law isn’t the final word; doing the job properly is.

When going to see your boss, always take a notebook and pen with you. Whatever the boss says—necessary or unnecessary—pretend to be a very attentive listener (leaning slightly toward the boss) and take necessary (and if needed, unnecessary) notes. Throw them away later if not needed. Keep your phone’s ringtone off in the boss’s room. If you can’t do something, don’t say “no” in a way that sounds bad. Don’t just sit down in a chair upon entering the boss’s room; sit when they ask you to sit. If the boss doesn’t extend their hand first, you don’t need to extend yours for a handshake. If the boss jokes around with you, don’t start joking around with the boss! The boss can be friendly, but they’re not your friend. Try to earn your boss’s trust. Show yourself to be reliable. If your boss doesn’t have to worry anymore about a task once they’ve given it to you, naturally the boss will like you. If instead of calling your other five colleagues, the boss calls you for various tasks, understand that you’re gradually becoming powerful in your office. Being powerful means being able to keep yourself in the good graces and close to the most powerful person.

When the boss tells a joke, even if you don’t find it funny, laugh heartily (I mean, show your teeth). Even if it’s an old or common joke, act as if you’re hearing it for the first time in your life. When you go before your boss, play dumb, give them a chance to teach you—never try to teach them.

Make him understand that you know less than he does, understand less. Whatever people might say outwardly, they always prefer to boss over someone less intelligent than themselves. Perhaps that’s why men generally don’t like women who are more intelligent than they are. For women, it’s the opposite. Women usually prefer men who are more intelligent than themselves. I’m speaking in the context of Bangladesh, where family authority mostly rests with men. Anyway, praise your boss’s taste, even if his taste isn’t utterly appalling. When your boss posts something on Facebook, give it a like or other relevant react, whether you’ve read it or not—write things like “Wow,” “Excellent,” “Outstanding,” “Congratulations,” “Looks so beautiful,” “The best photo I’ve seen on Facebook,” “Truly mesmerized,” “Sir, you should publish a book at the next book fair.” When he posts pictures of his family members, comment in such a way that he feels nothing more beautiful than his family members has ever been born on this earth. Perhaps your boss won’t like or react to your comment, but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t noticed your comment or react due to being busy. Bosses see everything, they see and stay quiet, so you think he’s so busy he didn’t have time to see your comment, or that he’s indifferent to all the praise in the world. If you don’t believe it, just try giving a single laughing or crying react to a post like “My daughter got an A+ in the PSC exam” and see what happens! What’s the point of a boss living if his subordinates don’t like or comment on his Facebook posts! In my working life, I’ve had to face trouble for the crime of not liking or commenting on my boss’s posts.

Give all credit to your boss. You yourself also like to hear your subordinates’ achievements claimed as your own. Ask yourself honestly—don’t you really? How could you have done that if your boss hadn’t managed you well? Knowing how to give credit to your boss is also an art. The job of flaunting one’s own achievements—even a donkey could do that. No one likes to think that their subordinate is brighter than them. Publicly (preferably in front of the boss) say with your mouth: I did this work under my boss’s guidance/with my boss’s cooperation/on my boss’s advice. Even if the boss didn’t know about it beforehand, he’ll be happy to hear such praise. When credit for good work is given to him, work he knew nothing about, so he says… this is your credit, you did this, I have no role here, etc. etc… I haven’t seen anyone yet give such an honest and simple confession. If you prove your boss to be much more qualified and powerful than you, you’ll be able to enjoy the benefits very directly. You might be a lion, but if your boss thinks you’re a goat, then at the end of the day you’re just a goat! Nothing can be done! The brightest and most successful employee is the one who is closest to the office boss. You might get angry hearing all this, but I can say from my experience, there’s really nothing to be done.

More important than understanding what your boss is saying is understanding what your boss isn’t saying but wants to convey. There are many things we feel embarrassed to say out loud but mentally want someone to understand and act accordingly. If we find someone like that, we make them our trusted person. Try to read your boss’s mind—if you succeed in that task, you’ll surely get the benefits. How many battles have you fought in life to read your girlfriend’s mind, and what did you get in return… nothing but a breakup? Better than that… understand your boss, the boss won’t send you away empty-handed. Not everyone eats rice, some eat bread too. Not all bosses consume work, some consume words, and some consume other things too. Try to understand who prefers to eat what. Argue less with your boss on various matters. If you have a different opinion, cleverly avoid that work or make mistakes in it. That way the work will automatically shift to someone else’s shoulders. Just because you have capability doesn’t mean you always have to show it. The most capable person is one who knows when and where to hide their capability. When we say something contrary to someone, their mind considers us an opponent or someone distant. If you don’t do the work after arguing with your boss, you get two faults, but if you fail to do the work without arguing, you get only one fault. Even if you can make your boss understand that despite sincere effort you couldn’t do the work, it will stick in the boss’s mind that actually it’s not your fault, you tried with everything you had. In other words, even if you cleverly avoid the work without getting into an argument with your boss, you won’t be as much a victim of the boss’s anger.