Those melancholy masks

I have erred…
This time I have truly committed the crime!
All that has gone wrong until today,
all the injustice I have done to you,
all of it I now offer at your feet
in my heart-churned confession,
burning it in the fire of remorse
on this altar of my repentant soul.

Crush me and with me all my crimes and errors
beneath your feet, or
wring out all your fury upon me…
kill me if you will!
But please, do not dismiss
my remorse, my admission of repentance…

I erred during the solar eclipse,
I erred by not seeking wonder in the moon's other half,
I erred in understanding the glory of incomplete love
within your complete trust!

Believe me, I erred
in feeling the pull of that heart
hidden behind all your harsh, melancholy masks,
in truly understanding that unspoken, utterly personal
you who belonged to me alone!

This is what failure means!
Defeat is nothing but this!
I have done wrong!
One whose mind holds such limitations—
how can he receive you as sacred?

Even in the wreckage of this pain-pierced heart
at the borderlands,
I keep searching for you in every blue lotus…
I have done wrong!
Such a grave mistake!
I am truly repentant!