- I had no expectation of love for much of my life. I consider myself a rather dull vessel. Suddenly I stopped in my tracks seeing you. I won't hesitate to say it—a longing for love was born, touching an intensely impossible dimension. I thought perhaps I could keep life vibrant in some simple way. But the reality is, I lack that capacity. - You have the capacity, and quite a good measure of it too. That's why we were able to walk together quite well for a considerable distance. The problem is, I'm not simple as a person. My nature isn't simple either. I don't easily take offense at words or actions, and I certainly don't impose obligations. I let everyone remain in their own space. But when something does bother me, you can be certain the matter becomes quite complex. - I think it's unreasonable to view you in a controversial light. Much of my time on this earth has passed. So saying you're not a simple person isn't right. You are authentic.
- What can I say! May your places of faith remain intact. Because what we think or hold in belief, its fulfillment or incompleteness doesn't have immediate meaning. After a time, time itself reveals its true translation. Until then, everyone must wait to know the authenticity of their own understanding. You too will have to—to identify your true, solid, authentic self. And no one can impose obligations on anyone else. This relates to individual development. Only the individual understands where they can or cannot remain; none of us can impose obligations on them, nor should we be able to.
- Wanting to keep oneself as oneself—this is an individual's sovereign right. Anyone else is unwelcome there. But from that same sense of sovereignty, anyone can extend themselves. - I've never possessed the qualification to give anyone breathing space. I believe the individual constructs their own domain. - What you've assured me of, I understand. But you speak of complex matters—instead of keeping those in your own grasp, you could deposit them with time, which would at least make accepting tomorrow easier. - You know, however long it takes someone to say something, it takes me less time than that to analyze its meaning, review it, and determine the outcome. I don't struggle to arrange events one after another. Speaking of belief, this isn't my belief—you could call it tested experience. In belief, people remain somewhat blind; experience is real truth. Whatever the case, this is how much I know myself so far; there may be some change due to time and circumstances, I have nothing to say about that. If I'm ready to accept something new, I'll accept it. While much is deposited with time, I prefer to keep something for myself, even if just for myself. At least until time says change is inevitable. Simply put, I can never force false acting upon my heart. - I've kept you up very late. The words have been spoken—this is no small thing! At least I got another chance to see myself. I have theoretical disagreements with many of your words. These really need to be broken down turn by turn in conversation; there's no such opportunity here.
- We want to keep the phrase 'false acting' in our own defense, but covering our ultimate annoyance, we civilized people say, 'See you again,' 'Take care,' etc. Perhaps people aren't born with the opportunity to deny duplicity. We're all duplicitous—some egotistically, some for balance. - I understand, according to your theory I'm uncivilized. That doesn't give me the slightest headache though. I'd rather stay well in this state.
- You've actually said something I would never even utter. Now it's impossible to make you understand anything without speaking face to face. Please, don't place me in the meaning you just extracted—you can tell me if there's an error in the proper use of words. - I said if there's face-to-face conversation at points of disagreement, it would be convenient. What did you understand! - Oh! I didn't say that. You said "covering our ultimate annoyance, we civilized people say, see you again, take care..." I've never done that, nor will I. So I said, according to this theory I'm outside the civilized.
- Then why did you go outside the civilized! If you're saying you express all your dislikes, then I have nothing to say. But I think people shouldn't express all their annoyances... if they want to keep life simple. Look, you used two words: 1. Uncivilized, 2. Outside the civilized. You must acknowledge how much difference there is between these two words!
- Not expressing dislike actually makes life complex. The people on the other side will think it's liked and keep repeating it, and one has to face the same annoyance again. I express all my annoyances—that doesn't always have to be in words. - I disagree with you on this. You might be saying, whether in words or gestures, you shake off all your dislikes. No, friend, I don't believe this is possible at all. And if you've managed it, then you're someone special. - You probably don't notice small things. Otherwise you wouldn't say this. In your case too, I've always expressed my dislikes, whether it's the parting 'good night' greeting or other things!
- Haven't you seen how much a person fills themselves with new shells when they become lonely! This is verbal disdain. Is the matter only as you're thinking!? - What do I know! I feel there might be some psycho-emotional aspect. It seemed somewhat difficult. - No, why would it be difficult! I may not know how difficult death is, but I'm beginning to understand how difficult it is to stay alive! - Friend! One who forgets the name of 'morning' and calls it 'evening'—they can indeed be called a life-rejecter. They can be called indifferent about life, about time. Then there's numbness within them. - How does numbness happen! Those who become indifferent about life, I think they have the emptiness of a truly solitary person. Does anyone really become indifferent about life? - Perhaps life itself neglects the individual. But you are ultimately the story of an organized person. May your circumference be constructed of all things auspicious and beautiful.