"You know, Ma, what a scene there was today! Remember Sudha-bu mentioned her brother-in-law the other day?" "Yes, so what happened?" "Today I was insisting that Dada, Sudha-bu, and I go eat fuchka at the mango grove. Just then Rajib saheb suddenly showed up and took us to eat fuchka. He didn't seem at all like what Sudha-bu had described that day. He's quite good-looking, Ma!" "Will you be quiet? You're chattering away non-stop! Ma, don't listen to her nonsense!" "Alright, enough talk. Now come eat. I'm setting the food on the table." Khushbu's excitement over a little conversation on the first day doesn't sit well with me at all. Anyway, in all the chatter I completely forgot to get Sudha's phone number! I'm hopeless! "Dada, here, take this! Sudha-bu asked me to give you this paper. And yes, I know you're going to ask if I opened and read it. For your information, I've already opened it and read it." With that, Khushbu bolted away... I felt terribly embarrassed and angry with her. She's getting too clever by the day. Opening the paper made my heart pound! You son of a turtle! You'll never become human, couldn't even get the courage to ask for my number after all this time! I'm so angry with you! Wondering why I'm calling you 'tui' instead of 'tumi'? Well, I am! You deserve to be called 'tui', you donkey! Here's my phone number. If you don't call within the next ten seconds, I'll punch you and break your nose, you rascal! Yours, Sudha Learning that Sudha thinks all this about me hurt deeply - my image was completely ruined! Well, I hurriedly called... "Y-y-yes... hello...! Wh-who is this? S-S-Sudha speaking?" "Your death speaking, you worthless fool! Why are you stuttering like that, you idiot? When will you ever mature? I feel like crying my heart out!" "Sudha, calm down, please. Don't be like this." "Oh, such airs! 'Calm down, Sudha'... don't you have any other way to soothe my anger?! What a complete goat!" "Er, no, I mean... Sudha-bu, please calm down... don't be like this." "Oh God! How pathetic your attempts at pacifying me are! Devil, turtle, frog, cat, monkey! If I get my hands on you, I'll beat you to pieces... ugh!" The line went dead with a bang. Sudha is really furious! I can't face her at college tomorrow, or I won't come back in one piece. But I can see the real fun is in making her angry... my s-s-Sudha-bu! I can't stop laughing, my cheeks hurt so much, oof! The poor thing is probably still cursing me all alone! Devil's bones! Just come to college once tomorrow, then I'll show you fun! Calling me s-s-Sudha-bu? Just wait, I'll get you! Unromantic goat! What misfortune made me fall in love with this scoundrel...! Ugh! I feel so shy somehow. Sudha covered her face with both hands and started laughing. Is this the same Sourabh I once couldn't stand to see? Whose very name made me burn with anger and jealousy - and now I love him so much! How strange are the Creator's ways! When you left me and went away, only then did I realize that while fighting with you, I had unknowingly fallen deeply in love with you, without understanding it myself! I never told you. Are you thinking of me now, Sourabh? Are you thinking the girl is awful, very bad! She said so many harsh things to me! She scolded me so terribly! What can I do, tell me! You don't understand me at all! Hmm, maybe you'll say, how much do I understand you either! You girls always want this - for people close to you to understand your feelings without you ever saying anything. But when it comes to understanding us, you only use logic and arguments! Don't I understand you? I've understood you little by little, gotten to know you every moment. That's why this Sudha wants to pour her whole self into your name. Even when you're lost, why do you hide from my eyes, Sourabh? Why won't you admit that you love me very much too?! Your self-respect is so strong, but see, despite my repeatedly hurting you there, you couldn't bring yourself to hate me - you loved me instead! Actually, you know what - when someone loves too deeply, a new person automatically starts forming within them. No one wants to sacrifice their inner self for someone else, to change themselves for another. When you love, it's like being reborn, and much of the previous life's person changes. "Sudha! What are you doing in the garden? Come here for a bit!" Sudha looked up startled - Sumi apu was calling her. "Yes, I'm coming!" "Baba wants to see you, Sudha. Go to Baba's room." "Baba, may I come in?" Sudha's father gestured for her to come closer. "What's wrong, Baba? Do you need anything?" He gestured again, no, come here and sit with me for a while. "Ma, have you given Baba his medicine?" "Yes, Rajib babaji gave it to him just a while ago. Your baba has been trying to say something since yesterday, you know, but I can't understand." "Baba, what do you want to say? Tell me." Sudha placed her hand on Baba Nawaz Siddiqui's hand. "Ma, Baba is trying to write something on my hand." "See if you can understand." Broken syllables: R..S..Z..M.. 1..1..2.. "What are these, Baba? I can't understand." "Sudha... Sudha... where did you go?" "Ma, I think Rajib bhaiya is calling. Baba, I'll be right back." "I can never find you. Where do you stay?" "I went to Baba's room for a bit. Why did you call me?" "Listen, the other day when we met Sourabh-babu, there was a girl with him, what was her name...?" "Khushbu, Sourabh's younger sister." "Yes... yes... Khushbu. They haven't been able to get the girl admitted to school yet?" "How did you know!?" "No, on the way today I met Sourabh's father - Kabir saheb. I didn't know him, but your Sumi apu introduced us. During our conversation, Khushbu came up." "Oh, I see." "I'm thinking, there's a good school right here near Presidency College. I'll speak to the school committee and get her admitted there. What do you think?" "Great! That's wonderful! They'll be so happy." This is the first time I've liked anything Rajib bhaiya said. I think the man is bad, but actually he's not that bad. "Alright, fine, I'll tell Sourabh when I go to college today. He'll discuss it at home." "Okay, no problem. I have Kabir saheb's number, I'll also speak with him." I'll give Sourabh this news as soon as I enter college. I hope he won't refuse. It's already been several months, Khushbu has fallen behind in her studies. There's that monkey coming! "Hey you, come here, nawabzada!" "How are you, Sudha?" "That's for later. First let me give you some good news." "Yes, tell me." "Yesterday Rajib bhaiya apparently met Uncle, and Sumi apu was with him too. She introduced them. During their conversation, Khushbu came up - that she hasn't been admitted anywhere since coming to Kolkata. So Rajib bhaiya wants to get her admitted to a good school near our college by speaking to the school committee. What do you say?" "No no, that's not necessary. He doesn't need to go to that trouble. I'll manage to get her admitted in a few days." "Why are you saying no? Rajib bhaiya wants to help on his own initiative. Besides, Khushbu has already fallen far behind. Please don't refuse." I couldn't say anything more in front of Sudha. And she wasn't wrong about anything. "Alright, fine, tell him to meet with me." Two days later, taking Khushbu with us, Baba, I, and Rajib saheb got her admitted to school. But my heart didn't agree to it. Rajib saheb bought Khushbu a new phone. I had refused, but everyone objected to my refusal; they said he did this considering us his own. He sees Khushbu like a younger sister. Khushbu was also very happy about it, she didn't mind anything. My little sister is still very young, what does she understand! She trusts everyone with her simple heart. I often saw that whenever Khushbu had any problem, Rajib saheb would be the first to appear, getting worried whenever he learned of any difficulty we had. I could never discover anything bad or dishonest in his behavior! My relationship with Sudha grew deeper day by day. We spent good time together, talked, went out, and studies were going well too. Meanwhile Khushbu became an SSC candidate, looking even more beautiful than before. Rajib saheb regularly checked on us. And he never stopped Sudha from mixing with our family. Rather, his caring attitude toward Sudha had increased from before. Now Sudha couldn't bear to hear any bad comments about Rajib bhaiya from anyone! This somehow bothered me! Is this Sudha the same Sudha!? Before I knew it, college was over. When the dream is crossing the university threshold, one has to be a bit selfish! Now it's not possible to meet Sudha much, I don't get much time during the day to talk either. Early morning good morning and good night before bed - that's all our conversation. Sudha sometimes sulks, but later she understands. My situation is that I have to study a lot, while Sudha can organize everything with just a little study, so finding time is easier for her than for me. We both understand each other quite well - this connection working is what completes love.
Sometimes it would happen that we wouldn’t speak for two or three days, and then Sudha would come to our house, meet with mother, and we’d spend some time together. Sumi apu didn’t like me at all, so she would often create obstacles whenever I wanted to see her. Surprisingly, Rajib bhaiya would help in these situations, managing apu by talking to her. Over these few years, my relationship with Rajib bhaiya had become much easier, which was certainly due to his acceptance of our love! He would fulfill all of Sudha’s wishes, create opportunities for her to meet me, and Sudha too began to trust and rely on Rajib bhaiya greatly. And Khushbu had liked Rajib bhaiya from the very beginning—I mean, Rajib bhaiya had become something of a comforting habit for everyone.
Meanwhile, Khushbu was now a college student. She had become more focused on her studies than before, Rajib bhaiya had arranged good tutoring for her, and he kept track of all her subjects too. From the start of her college final exams until university admission, I had no attention for anything else, couldn’t spare time for anyone, didn’t chat with family members as before, didn’t quarrel with Khushbu, didn’t go out together either. You could say that Rajib bhaiya alone was managing everything single-handedly.
On the other side, Sudha’s brother Sajib bhaiya had taken their parents to America for better medical treatment. So at home there were only Sudha, Sumi apu, and Rajib bhaiya. After uncle left, Sudha began to notice another side of Rajib bhaiya.
Sudha didn’t get serious about things as before, didn’t think deeply about them, especially regarding Rajib bhaiya! Rajib bhaiya was doing so much for all of us, no one could ever find any fault with him. But somehow my heart wouldn’t give consent regarding him, there seemed to be a kind of ferocity in his gaze, though that was only visible to me!
After five long months of relentless hard work, the long-awaited day of the university entrance exam finally arrived! I was terribly frightened—would there really be a place for me among all these brilliant minds? But I had faith in myself; all those sleepless nights couldn’t go to waste! How many moonlit evenings and nights, new moons, full moons, torrential rains breaking the sky, sometimes rainbows after the rain, the crimson glow of twilight, the dahuk bird’s homecoming at day’s end, the cool morning breeze, walking hand in hand with my beloved barefoot on the grass, staying up all night writing poetry, filling up WhatsApp walls with meaningless chatter, the joy of eating fuchka under that mango tree—I had sacrificed all of this to a pile of books and notebooks, wept profusely on my prayer mat, raised both hands and cried every day; how could the Creator turn me away!? He could never be that harsh!
On exam day, after taking blessings from my parents, Sudha and I set out together. We were assigned to two different wards. Sudha didn’t seem too worried. Seeing thousands of students, parents, I became even more nervous, especially seeing the bespectacled students dried up my mouth. For some reason, I used to think that kids who wore glasses were very brilliant! They seemed like know-it-all scholars. Anyway, when I came out of the hall after the exam, nothing could stop me!
Without waiting for the results, I secretly broke off a krishnachura branch in the university campus courtyard and waited for Sudha to come out. Today I was calm, fearless. I wasn’t in any hurry; today I was ready to hold the hand of the person I loved for the rest of my life! Yeah, well, no, I mean even though I was starting with a stolen krishnachura!
As soon as Sudha came out, I pushed through the crowd and ran to her. It seemed her exam had gone well, so without asking, I went straight and knelt down. Taking out the krishnachura branch from behind…
“Sudha, will you…”
“Why did you stop, Sourabh? Tell me!”
“Will you for the rest of your life…”
“Yes, tell me…will I what for the rest of your life? Tell me, Sourabh!”
“Will you be willing to cook for me for the rest of your life!?”
Sudha was completely unprepared for this, and to tell the truth, I was stunned myself! What I meant to say and what I actually said. Now I’d surely get a few blows on my back!
“Oh my lover boy! Am I being proposed to? That too with a krishnachura branch! I’ll cook for you, will I!? Frog, cat, turtle of nowhere! Wait, you, I’ll show you cooking! Scoundrel boy, in your whole life you never came forward to propose romantically, forget about it, you couldn’t even say a simple ‘I love you,’ and today you’re proposing to me with a krishnachura branch to cook for you!”
“Su-su-Sudhaabu, calm down…you shouldn’t do this!”
Saying this, I took off running! I heard…
“If you call me su-su-Sudhabu again, just wait!”
Sudha was chasing me with the krishnachura branch in hand. After running for a long time, I couldn’t go on anymore and lay down on the grass in front of a hall. Gasping, Sudha also came and lay down straight beside me, and by then our laughter seemed to touch the sky! Above us the vast blue sky, below the ocean of green, between them two yellow birds…lost in deep love…
A small kiss touched both our lips…lost in deep gazing! It felt as if we were bound together for several lifetimes! Lying beside my enchantress, my most beautiful beloved, I felt like the greatest lover in the world! What greater fulfillment could there be in love than this!?
I am grateful to the Creator, for giving me a little fairy like Khushbu, for giving me a family, for giving me a life companion like Sudha, for letting me successfully complete each chapter of my life, for making my life’s path so smooth, for giving me this moment today…I am happy, today I am a very happy person!
Being able to place the person you love beside happy thoughts—this is a matter of great fortune!
Stay by my side even in my days of sorrow, Sudha! May this mutual faith between us live on for several lifetimes…
Cutting through these thoughts, the phone’s ringtone suddenly rang…
(To be concluded in the next part)