Reflection: Nine-Twenty-Eight ……………………………………………………………… One. The tree contemplates its own vast grandeur— and wonders, absorbed in thought, why the rose has come to earth, for what reason, caught? Ah, the heart is like a woman— loving the impossible so, her tears of longing never cease to flow! She knows only how to weep— all her raptures without cause; wise reason glances sideways... and mocks her with applause. Two. It's no problem if a person isn't elevated; the real problem is when they lack the desire and effort to elevate themselves. Three. I have two wishes of you: May we never meet again. May we never be parted. The closer people come, the farther they drift away. Four. When will you know you're a successful person? ...When you see that the money is yours, but everyone else makes the decisions. When will you know you're a failed person? ...When you see that the money belongs to others, but you make the decisions. When will you know you're a fulfilled person? ...When you see that the life is yours, and the decisions are yours too. Five. Those who don't have proper toilets at home are the ones leaving nonsensical comments all over Facebook. It's not their fault—it's all a matter of nature. Six. When victory over someone brings no glory, accepting defeat without a fight is itself glorious. Time is short; so we must learn to lose gracefully to those who have time in abundance. If we can't learn this, they'll spend their time while ours gets wasted. The difference is vast—we must understand it. Seven. Time is short; so we must learn to lose gracefully to those who have time in abundance. If we can't learn this, they'll spend their time while ours gets wasted. The difference is vast—we must understand it. Eight. Let us not forget: the medicine that cures the illness is good medicine, even if it tastes terrible. Nine. Come, beloved, let us both live only so that I may love you, and you may love me. Ten. I'm not fat, man—actually, I just have excellent taste in food. I really love eating good food. You're all skinny because you have no taste for food at all—good food just doesn't agree with your stomachs. I'm healthy, you're sick; you take the tablets. Eleven. If you always spend time with ordinary people, you can never become extraordinary. So, often spend some time with your soul to become extraordinary. Twelve. Soul, soul and only soul matters. Take care of it. Thirteen. Even if no one else in the world loves you, I alone will love you. Even if everyone else in the world hates you, I alone will not hate you. Fourteen. Perhaps when it's time to leave, people want to cling to their loved ones. So when I see someone close to me caring too much, checking up constantly, wanting to stay near—I get very frightened. Fifteen. Earning money is difficult, and enjoying it is even harder. Sixteen. This shore weeps thinking of the other, That shore weeps looking toward this one, Between them flows a river of separation, Both banks shrouded in dense darkness. Shore to shore, through ages upon ages, Whispered conversations in the twilight, The river flows on, receiving no response, Yet paying the full price of the long night. I don't know in what magical moment Night will meet day's invitation, This shore and that will become one— This infinite expanse will find dissolution.
Seventeen. Many people hold various opinions about the words ‘prayer’ and ‘worship.’ Most people consider them one and the same. When we look at their true meanings, we find that in some places there is a vast difference between these two words, while elsewhere they are related as steps to a palace. Prayer has another name: begging, or expressing a sense of want; it arises from lack or the consciousness of lack. Worship has another name: contentment, or expressing satisfaction with one’s condition. ‘Upasana’ (worship) means ‘coming close and sitting.’ Worshippers are rich and content in spirit; they seem to want nothing—they possess both inner home and inner wealth. In prayer, a person accepts self-reproach and seeks peace, while in worship one seeks peace through the wealth of the heart itself. However, when prayer means begging for virtue or purity, then it serves as a step toward worship. In this case, prayer becomes preparing oneself for worship by purifying oneself. Both have the same goal: finding peace. Since worship has one fewer step, reaching peace becomes easier here, though one must first prepare oneself for worship through prayer.
Eighteen. Our relationships may crumble like a shaky wall. Even then, scattered desires will remain. The relationship won’t stand as a perfect pillar just by wishing, but the ground of love remains steady! Even when the wall crumbles, beneath the foundation, the ground endures. I may not need my wall, but I’m not willing to give up my share of that ground.
Nineteen. Every age has its own beauty. The changes that come with age are quite pleasing to behold. A forty-year-old woman, no matter how much she polishes and scrubs, won’t look like a twenty-year-old girl—rather, she’ll look bizarre… especially those who go on all sorts of diet plans to stay thin! I certainly prioritize staying healthy, but turning myself into a living skeleton in the name of dieting is impossible for me. How do those who become sticks through excessive dieting look? Do they look childlike? Age has its own groove. The age of an elderly person can never be hidden, no matter what theatrics are performed.
After a certain time, beauty will fade, but close people never get trapped by beauty. One never needs to trap one’s own people. Everything of one’s own person belongs to oneself. When a child grows up before their parents’ eyes, the joy and wonder that operates there is exactly the same joy found in growing old with one’s own person. Embracing one’s own person with both hands brings joy in all conditions; moments spent with one’s own person transcend all beauty. Most importantly, one never needs to hold onto one’s own person through any external means.
Thought: Nine Hundred Ninety-Nine
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One. One doesn’t need to complain about life every single day. Even for complaining, a person gets only one life. By closing the door of expectations to everyone and quietly diving into whatever exists, whatever is possible to do, learning to live that way—there is no life more beautiful than this life. Even if reality is inappropriate and inconsistent, it is beautiful and diverse. The more one’s life is wrapped in reality, the more one struggles alone in life—the more content one becomes.
No one can be blamed for anything, not even a fraction. I must hold myself accountable for everything in my life, every single moment. I must lift myself up and get back in line by my own effort. Every moment, yes, every single moment, I must live for everyone. I know others will prioritize their own interests, but helping others move forward on their paths means keeping myself dynamic and active; and an active person is never unhappy. Instead of dwelling on what I didn’t achieve, the real thing is to see what can still become possible through me.
Two. You asked, “What is love?”
I said, “What love truly is, how would I know! But I’ve come to understand that ‘you’ is the name for an innocent sliver of a smile, a handful of peaceful breath, a shoulder of trust, a firm fist, a beloved familiar scent, a chest as vast as the world filled with gentle peace, a tender voice, and… and… a few steps of life wrapped in reassurance!”
Three. On some moonlit, enchanting evening, I want to leave.
The night before I go, I want to sit with Mother and share a plate of hot white rice with dried fish paste, steam rising from our meal.
I want to gaze with a full heart for an hour at the village graveyard, at that very spot…
exactly where my father has been lying quietly for more than two decades.
The dog at that corner of the lane has had three puppies—I’ll buy them two packets of biscuits.
I want to write one last time in the inbox of that dear person who left last Baishakh… I won’t ask you to forgive me, I didn’t forgive either.
Tell me, why can’t moonlight be caught? Why can’t trees hear? Why can’t the dogs and cats waiting in the lanes speak? I had so much to say to them!
If only moonlight could be caught like fireflies, then I would fill a bottle with moonlight and carry it with me to that place from which no one ever returns, where no one’s cries can reach.
Why can’t this wandering life be contained in a bottle filled with moonlight? I am so terribly fond of moonlight!
Four. Why are you letting yourself disappear like this? If you keep hiding your emotions from everyone, one day they’ll truly vanish!
Who tells you to become stone like this? Is it so urgent to remain still in silence? All those words you’ve been saving up to speak—will they then be carved on my epitaph? Let them be, even so let them be!
Suppose I said, for one day, well… well… at least one lazy afternoon, to release yourself like peeling an onion, breaking all chains to become light as autumn cotton—would you? Or would you still say you prefer your melancholy? If I asked you to laugh at the soft touch of coriander, surely then you wouldn’t compare yourself to withered baldness dying in the suicide of scattered cotton fibers?
I love you. I feel so good loving you.
Five. I may never be able to forgive any of you, nor do I want to. Hatred has slowly grown inside me toward you all. This mountain of hatred wasn’t built in a day—it has grown bit by bit over years and years. I mistakenly placed the burden of responsibility for my clumsy life upon you, and I’m paying the price for it at every step. With excessive control, prohibitions, and webs of rules, you’ve disciplined me daily, and I, seeing your threatening looks, have followed all your commands and instructions to the letter like a foolish, soft, and obedient girl. Even doing all that, I seriously doubt how much I was able to please you or keep you happy. I say this with full understanding: as guardians, you have always neglected your responsibilities toward me.
I have truly changed so much. Unknowingly, very reluctantly, little by little, day by day, I have changed. It pains me deeply to accept this transformed self of mine. My life is no longer normal. All those things that naturally, normally happen in people’s lives—all of them now happen unnaturally in mine. Despite trying so hard, I can no longer make anything normal. The biggest truth is this: I have to try constantly, deliberately, just to stay alive. You can never understand how heavy a burden one becomes to oneself when one must keep trying, day after day, to preserve one’s own existence. How could you understand—you’ve never had to walk through this! Now I have to remind myself daily, explain to myself regularly—that I must live by accepting all of this! And this is the Creator’s test.
If I pass this test of the Creator’s, I will be rewarded, but what that reward will be, the Creator hasn’t said; whether I even need that reward, I don’t know either—yet I feel, perhaps I do. I only know this is life, this is how it is, I too must accept it and live this way. I must show everyone that even after all this, one can live beautifully! You have forcibly hurled so many challenges about life at me. I never wanted to compete with anyone like this, never wanted to constantly prove myself to others, never wanted to live for others’ approval. From childhood I wanted a simple, free, private, ordinary life, and you bound me in chains from that very childhood.
There now… I can no longer fly; are you happy? A failed person, a defeated weak person, a wing-clipped person stands before you. This weak person has become exactly what you wanted to see. Become a frightened woman in a dark, closed room! But I will never, ever forgive you. I will hate you for the rest of my life and keep myself mentally far, far away from you, and perhaps someday I’ll manage to remove myself physically as well. You’ll only know that you once had a daughter. Of course, that won’t matter much to you.
You probably don’t even know that there’s a very subtle difference between the sleep of effort, the sleep of exhaustion, the sleep of peace, the sleep of weariness.
You don’t know how much it hurts me to speak of sadness daily, to keep myself distracted and consoled by doing something quietly when sad.
My life will never again be normal like other ordinary people’s. Once you’re thrown off life’s railway track, that train is never the same again. So many, many things change then. And I myself am most responsible for all of this. That I always tried to please you—even by hurting myself! Who is a greater sinner than I!
I ask only this of you: leave me to myself. Let me live fully with my own self. Whatever has been lost from my life or whatever I will never get back—I have no regrets about any of it anymore. I only want to live fully with myself now, nothing else. I am my own medicine for all my ailments, no one else. I need no one else to live.
Thought: Nine hundred ninety
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One. The amount of money women spend in a lifetime trying to preserve their beauty could buy houses and cars. Just to look beautiful, just to appear attractive and acceptable to men—seeing women spend so much money makes me laugh, and feel a little sad too.
I am a woman, and whatever I needed to present myself, the Creator has already given me; so why this endless polishing and buffing to make artificial what God has made naturally beautiful!
I have watched several beautiful friends of mine transform themselves into something grotesque with all this touching up. A few years ago, beauty treatments and salon visits—that was acceptable, but these days the cutting and stitching, the surgeries, lasers, hair transplants, and so on that go by the name of beauty care are truly frightening to behold.
One of my friends looked very innocent and beautiful before marriage, her skin tone was enchanting too; altogether she was strikingly beautiful. The moment she got her hands on her husband’s money after marriage, she threw herself into turning that beauty into ugliness. She had a baby, and before the child was even a year old…fearing that she had to hold onto her husband or the beautiful female colleagues at his office would bewitch him away—in this terror she went for body shaping while still breastfeeding! Can you imagine! Abandoning her own child because beauty became more essential! But is it ever really possible to bewitch and capture someone who doesn’t want to be lost or caught in the first place?
Another friend of mine wasn’t particularly beautiful before marriage, and their financial situation was quite poor too; she married into a well-off family, and immediately packed away her studies to enter the beauty competition! Now when I see this friend up close, it looks like someone has stuck plastic skin on both her cheeks—using Korean super-tight skin products has given her such a bizarre appearance that looking at her from the front, it feels like talking to a doll—skin stretched tight everywhere, not a mark or hair on her face, nothing natural at all…it’s frightening to look at, but she’s used so many products that if she stops using them, the poor thing’s face will become even more hideous!
Natural beauty is true beauty. Only someone who comes to me accepting my natural beauty is a beautiful person for me. Someone in whose eyes I must make myself unnatural to appear beautiful—such a person is never needed for living well. The most important quality of a beautiful person: knowing how to value naturalness in oneself and others.
Two. One day you will realize that none of them are truly your people. When talking to them, you no longer feel at ease; you have to justify every word. Alas, even after that day you will have to go on living with them!
Three. If you have too much fun, you’ll suffer that much more.
Four. What you understand easily won’t teach you much; what seems difficult and challenging will have much to teach you.
Five. No one can say where anyone’s sorrow really lies. So don’t feel bad when someone curses you. Perhaps their anger is actually directed at God. If your silence reduces the suffering of someone in pain, it will bring you merit.
Six. Do you know why I find the monks of the Ramakrishna Mission so appealing?
1. They never say: this is the best, come here alone, everything else is wrong, and so forth; I favor religious liberalism.
2. They are well-read, and one can speak with them joyfully about the scope of my knowledge and understanding.
3. Far from forcing or imposing anything on anyone, they say nothing about themselves of their own accord.
4. Their spirit of service and tolerance is captivating. To this day, no Maharaj has asked me to accept initiation into Sri Ramakrishna’s teachings.
5. They remain ever silent about their own knowledge, as though perpetually sheltered in the lap of the Supreme Brahman.
“As many opinions, so many paths.”
Seven. There is only one religion: human religion; what we call religions are merely different customs or ways!
Eight. Two types of people are always destined to be lonely:
People with beauty
People with brain
Nine. Wretched is the one whom a fool favors. For the fool expects his favored person to commit the same follies as he does. When they don’t act that way, the fool grows terribly moody and poisons the life of his favored person. Though foolishness may seem irritating to you, to the fool it is perfectly natural, normal behavior. This is why it’s best to avoid fools at any cost. Even a good fool is, at day’s end, still a fool. A bad lion is better than a good fool.
If those who like you happen to be stupid and senseless, then you are certainly in grave danger. Stupid and senseless people will unknowingly irritate and embarrass you. They won’t understand that what they’re doing is wrong, or that you’re being irritated or embarrassed by their behavior. Sometimes it will happen that even when you speak plainly, they won’t grasp it. They’ll think, “What did I do wrong now!” And you’ll think, “O Earth! Split open, let me climb a tree!”
Ten. Something suddenly comes over me!
The sky doesn’t please me, the moon doesn’t satisfy my mind;
My soul doesn’t laugh in moonlight, nor does my heart grow melancholy in darkness.
I feel no exhilaration in living, no restlessness in the face of death.
No one’s eyes dazzle me with their magic, no one’s voice enchants my soul to distraction.
Sometimes these strange things happen to me!
My mother’s voice, a loved one’s call, or a favorite melody…nothing seems to draw me.
Poetry’s essence, a story’s excitement, or a thriller’s suspense…nothing makes my mind dance.
I truly cannot understand what has happened to me.
Have I perhaps died in exactly that way…in which millions of dead people across the world live on, perfectly alive!
Thought: Nine Hundred Ninety-Nine
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One. God gives beauty to some but not virtue; virtue to others but not beauty; to those blessed with both beauty and virtue, He doesn’t grant a beautiful and virtuous life partner.
Still, God gives all three together to a precious few. One such person is the great Virat Kohli.
Recently, with Kohli surpassing Sachin’s records, there’s talk of making his biopic. When Ranveer was asked if he’d be willing to act in Virat’s biopic, he replied:
“I think Virat should play himself in his own biopic. Virat looks better than many actors. Not only that, his fitness is flawless!”
What an artistic comment from one great artist about another!
Two. Age 40/45, yet seeking brides aged 20/22! Why?
Surely a mature person would feel most at ease with another mature person, wouldn’t they? How does a man of forty or forty-five adapt to being with such a young girl? Their very outlooks on life must be entirely different—so why do such things happen?
Though the capacity to satisfy has little to do with age, do many people make this choice purely in hope of physical fulfillment, or are there other reasons? What do you think?
A mature person should be able to adjust quickly with another mature person, understand each other deeply; most importantly, a mature woman navigates life understanding its realities, making compromises in many things—so why does this happen otherwise? Marriage is inherently a tremendously risky decision; isn’t marrying a girl with an immature mind even riskier?
Such a brief life…how easily people destroy it with the whims of marriage!
Three. Not much, just one honest thing I’ll say. Not having you has made me far happier than I could ever have been if I’d gotten you. When one gets everything, one loses everything.
To survive in this world, one needs happiness that resembles sorrow more than one needs sorrow that resembles happiness. If I had gotten you, I would have lost that happiness-like-sorrow first of all. Everyone can endure sorrow, but not everyone can endure happiness.
Another thing. When you occasionally remind me of my place by letting me know I won’t have you—you’re reminding yourself more than informing me, I clearly understand. You fear I might claim some right again! Don’t worry, I never will. You can ‘use’ me freely without any exchange. I know that in your eyes, while I may not be particularly good for loving, I’m exceedingly good for using. I no longer have any claim when it comes to love—rest easy.
I don’t need rights, just let me remain. If you won’t let me remain, don’t drive me away either. Even if you do drive me away, I’ll still be here—you just won’t know it.
Four. There’s only one sanctuary in my life where I can live, and that is you—where I can exist a little in my own way. Here no one forbids me anything, there are no obligations of any kind; it’s entirely my own territory, where I feel free even within four walls. If I ever lose this place too, I’ll have nothing left in this world that’s truly my own peaceful refuge. I don’t know what I’d live for then. Though I’m not always with you now, I carry this comfort within me—that I too have my own place of trust, however insignificant or unnamed it may be, but it exists! You are my place to breathe. To have you, I don’t need you.
Well, how long will I be able to remain in your life? No one knows their own lifespan beforehand, but I find myself wanting to know… desperately wanting to know. Will I be able to stay with you even in your old age, if I’m still alive then? But by then you’ll have no need for me, I’ll find no excuse to come to you or spend time with you. What pretext will I have then to see you a little, or to seek a touch of your presence? Without social bonds between people, does such contact or communion persist? And why would you seek me out anymore? You’ll be blissfully happy with your family then, perhaps you won’t even remember me. These years that have passed in meetings and partings—will they hold no value then?
The more I convince myself that I have nothing to ask of you, the more such thoughts arise in my mind. Is it then that the roots of every expectationlessness are actually embedded in expectation itself? Today I don’t want to possess you because you exist; but when you are no longer here, will I not want you even then?
Five. I didn’t love you to sit in leisure and regret later; I loved you with everything I had and the utmost I could give; so I will honor that commitment I made to myself until death—no matter how small I may seem to you.
I know you don’t take love seriously, you only perform at loving. When I speak of love in such broken, overwhelming terms, you find me melodramatic and my love cheap. Even so, I will prove with everything I have that I love you more than I love myself. I don’t want to possess you, I only want to love you.
However you may be, I will continue loving you exactly this way. You are as you are, I am as I am; my love is like this—like us.
Reflection: Nine Hundred and Ninety-Two
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One. Without feeding kulfi, friend,
no selfie for you!
I ate kulfi from Kushtia. Absolutely delectable!
Two. Kali Puja, the midnight worship. Tonight, after many years, I’m staying up to wander around some of Kushtia’s pandals. Children running about, fireworks, revelry, tasting prasad, illuminations, staying up chatting through the night. Quite an elaborate festival for such an intense form of worship. Those observing the fast wait… for when the Mother’s puja will conclude. Mental peace comes only after physical hardship.
Worshipping Shakti is no simple task… history bears witness that when done with complete surrender of heart and soul, it awakens all consciousness.
(Those interested may read my piece ‘Kalichaitanya.’)
Three. Girl, perhaps you’re deceiving yourself. Look, to build a relationship, you too must compromise on many, many things. You must move forward pretending not to see what you’ve seen, not to understand what you’ve understood. You’re always finding fault with others—don’t you ever make mistakes yourself?
Can you live completely alone, without any human being? Without society? If we can stay in relationships by overlooking everyone else’s faults, even pretending not to see them, then isn’t the person you love just as human as everyone else? Why do you expect only them to be an angel? They too will learn through making mistakes as they go, but if you shut all doors in excessive expectation of one person, how will they understand you? Listen, a relationship must be built up, cultivated year after year like planting a tree; expecting everything from the very beginning—that’s actually abnormal.
And listen, girl, don’t be so misandric. Think about it—a woman who can’t stand the sight of men, I mean, she can’t trust any man enough to marry him, yet at the same time she keeps having one relationship after another with men! What does that even mean? She’s a man-hater, yet she can’t live without men. So how does that work out?!
Four. All this crying won’t help; instead, you need to remove yourself from the cause of tears. This world isn’t for those who weep, nor for those who laugh, but only for those who strive. If you’re crying all the time, when will you make an effort? And if you don’t try, why would your situation change? Whatever reason you’re crying for, it doesn’t matter to anyone. The person you’re crying over is doing just fine with whatever they’re doing—your tears truly hold no value for them. Someone who has left once has learned how to leave, so even if they want to return, don’t let them come back. You’re crying like a madwoman over someone who doesn’t think of you even once in an entire day! One-sided love is beautiful, but one-sided obsession is ugly. If thinking about your failures or weaknesses makes you cry, then spend sleepless nights preparing yourself instead—crying is nothing but a pointless waste of time.
Keep yourself busy, learn to keep yourself busy. Idle time gives birth to idle people.
Five. The more my sorrow grows, the more my capacity to bear others’ happiness increases.
Six. Suppose you get offered a high-paying job, along with a car and house—all other facilities included; but the condition is that you can’t spend that salary as you wish, you can’t buy or eat what you like, and only you can use that car and house—no one else from your family can live in the house or ride in the car. What would you actually do with all that money and facilities?
Suppose you marry a woman who loves you tremendously, she’s incredibly beautiful, smart in her manner; but the problem is, after marriage she won’t be able to cook for you, can’t have sex with you, and can’t give you any children. Would you marry this woman just because she loves you very much and is quite beautiful?
Suppose your husband has lots and lots of money, but the problem is you’d have to buy and wear only what he likes with that money; not only that, in times of trouble or need, or even for simple desires, you can’t spend it! What would such a millionaire husband actually give you?
Why do people make such marriages in life where they get nothing but a marriage signboard? I don’t know if such a life has any value at all!
Marrying the owner of millions and living according to his preferences, and living on rice and lentils due to lack of means—both somehow seem the same to me. In fact, the second option preserves self-respect. If I bind myself to such a relationship where I can’t even wear a simple dress of my choice, whom would I actually be satisfying by making such a marriage?
I know that countless women in Bangladesh go on living their domestic lives, maintaining relationships, even as they kill themselves a little each day. But perhaps I haven’t yet become the kind of woman with that sacrificing mentality—and that’s why no one likes me. On the other hand, I can’t force myself to change either. My independent life, bound by something as immature as marriage—where surviving requires compromising with your preferences, happiness, and joy at every moment—somehow feels like nothing more than a locked cage to me.
I know I’m being a bit extreme, but this luxury at someone else’s expense doesn’t appeal to me at all. Perhaps that’s why I’ll never find a companion in life.
Reflection: Ninety-three
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One. You consider me your idol.
Of your own volition—I never asked you to!
Fine, I understand, you consider me your idol.
Now your refrain is: you don’t like this about me, you don’t like that; why should I do this, why should I do that, blah blah blah…
Emperor of fools!
Why did you make me your idol in the first place? Did I ask you to? Does your idolizing or not idolizing me affect me in any way? Most importantly, have you even come close to achieving any of the things for which you made me your idol, or will you ever be able to?
If you idolize Shah Rukh Khan, then produce a ‘Jawan’ or create something at that level in your own field; don’t come at me with dialogues like “Why does Shah Rukh smoke? Smoking is harmful to health.” One puff of Shah Rukh Khan’s cigarette is worth far more than your entire life. Someone who lacks even this basic intelligence—their wisdom serves no purpose to society.
I didn’t send police to your house demanding you make me your idol! And your idolizing me hasn’t increased my income, intellect, or sexual prowess, has it?
You read my writing for your own benefit, listen to my speeches for your own benefit, and idolize me for your own benefit too. By the way, whatever I do, I also do for my own benefit—I do it because I enjoy it, not for your welfare. You could say you find me appealing. While being appealing to others is a great quality, finding someone appealing can be a kind of mental problem.
Even the dog you keep doesn’t behave according to your wishes. Yet you expect someone who doesn’t even know you to conform to your desires! I mean, seriously?! Judgmental moron!
Thank you. Because of you, we rank fourth globally in goat production.
Two. Most wives are like that terrible boss who establishes authority purely through volume. There’s nothing left to do but quietly submit, because they pay no heed to reason.
Three. O lover-man! You understand women’s hearts so well, yet you can’t pass the BCS preliminary exam, isn’t that right? Brother, will you teach me the ABCs? Are you mocking me?
The one who can successfully love at least one girl can also build rockets—the BCS exam is a trivial matter! But yes, the one who can successfully love a thousand boys might not be able to do anything except gaping or grinding teeth, because boys are so simple and straightforward—they fall in love at the mere sight of a girl. Maintaining them is even easier than keeping a dog—you have to oil a dog occasionally, but with a boy you don’t even need to do that. You just being a girl is enough!
Boys are so wonderful—just look at them and smile a little, and they tumble headlong into love! You don’t even need to look; they keep looking themselves and smile. Such ego-free simplicity you will never find in anyone except a child.
That’s why girls in Bangladesh have been supremely powerful from the moment they land in this world. He who has no one has God; and if that someone is a girl, then alongside God, all boys are also by her side!
Life is beautiful; come, let’s all eat Kushtia’s khaja together, with kulfi and malai!
Four. Sometimes, I hate to be honoured.
Five. One of my friends left Bangladesh for Canada in hope of peace. But the poor fellow didn’t realize he was taking his wife along! Now my friend regrets thinking that whether it’s home or abroad, when you have a wife with you! It would have been more peaceful for him to stay in the country! Domestic troubles are cheaper, meaning better, than foreign troubles. When your wife is with you, fire burns constantly even in Canada’s snow!
(If anyone’s life matches this post, it is entirely intended and not at all coincidental!)
Six. The girl who falls in love with anyone she sees still shops around ten stores to buy a simple hair clip!
Seven. If you don’t want to get burned… friend… don’t fall in love!
Eight. Religious bigotry is the primary symptom of irreligiousness.
Nine. Relationships are children of time.
Separation is time’s mother.
Ten. I don’t sleep; it’s not that sleep won’t come—I just don’t sleep. I stay awake and eat random things. I mix chanachur, extra peanuts, milk powder, black pepper powder, coffee, biscuits and chips powder together and eat; there’s one more thing with it.
I try to understand the Radha principle. Very interesting topic!
Night grows, weight grows.
Eleven. If your children ever want to send you to an old-age home, give me a call—I’ll come along.
You’ll feel lonely staying there alone.
Twelve. I asked God for peace,
God gave me you.
I asked God for you,
My peace disappeared.
Thirteen. Just as letting go is better than keeping someone hanging, coming away is also better than hanging on. Even if there’s no relationship, there remains respect.
Fourteen. I want to live every moment. To live requires some sorrow.
Suppose I have or am getting everything I want… there’s no incompleteness; wouldn’t such a life be terribly monotonous?
Better that you’re not here!
This little incompleteness is life, not having you is the name of life.
If I had gotten you, all desires would have ended.
You truly cannot live without sorrow. Knowing how to live with sorrow as a crown on your head—that’s the name of life.
You are that crown… in the kingdom of my heart.
Thoughts: Ninety-nine
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One. Getting slapped by your own mother is better than being cursed by someone else’s mother.
Two. Sorrow is the zakat of intelligence.
Three. Learn to value the emotions of those who love you. Then you’ll see that even after losing badly, you’ve won magnificently in the end.
Four. Give something attention and it becomes everything; ignore it and it becomes nothing! If you don’t give fear any attention, fear disappears. This holds true for any kind of fear.
Five. Many people have knocked on my page’s WhatsApp to ask: Why are you so devoted to the philosophy of the Shri Ramakrishna tradition?
Let me answer this differently. Apart from Buddhist, Jain, Christian, Sufi, and Sikh philosophy, I am also deeply devoted to the philosophies of Shri Aurobindo and Swami Nigamananda’s traditions. There are several others too; I’ll write about them from time to time.
I think I’ve managed to explain my position.
Six. No one in the Bengali language has written a better book on learning yoga exercises than Shri Neelmani Das, known as the ‘Iron Man.’ This book, published 66 years ago, has long since achieved classic status. The gentleman lived his entire life by Swami Vivekananda’s ideals and inspired everyone to follow them.
Today I bought this book again from the bookstall at Chittagong Ramakrishna Mission. Interestingly, this book also has high literary merit—you’ll understand once you read it. The author was both a spiritual seeker and a renowned researcher. The Bengali intellectual society of that time held Shri Neelmani Das in special reverence.
Seven. Don’t always explain your position. No matter how transparently or simply you do it, people almost always see it as weakness.
Let me teach you a simple wisdom: Unless absolutely compelled, never explain your position to anyone.
Eight. If someone doesn’t bother you, don’t bother them either.
Understanding this simple thing doesn’t require being a rocket scientist, let alone education—just common sense will do.
Destiny people used to bother others because they got commission when someone joined. But do you get commission for bothering people with promises of heaven?
Destiny people used to say: Come, let’s get rich together.
And the new Destiny-wallahs say: Come, let’s die together. (I mean, if you don’t die, there’s no other way to reach their imaginary heaven!)
I’m going to hell anyway—do you have a problem with that? I’m really confused!
Every religion is beautiful and valuable. Religiosity is a matter of high order. Don’t bring it down to the level of shamelessness. Seeing all this from you, any civilized person would just laugh.
Just as I don’t practice ‘imposed religion’ out of greed for heaven, I also don’t turn away from ‘imposed irreligion’ out of fear of hell.
One must not bother anyone, must not harm anyone. If practicing religion requires understanding more than these two things, then I don’t need that religion.
Beware of the heaven-wallahs!
Nine. When an outsider becomes an enemy, the damage is significant, but far greater damage occurs when home becomes foreign.
Ten. When professional identity becomes more important than friendship with someone, it becomes very difficult to maintain that friendship. However painful it may be, one must witness the death scenes of certain friendships.
Eleven. The merit of charity is consumed by its publicity.
Twelve. When multiple women are able to live together for a long time without disturbing each other’s peace, it’s one of the rarest events in the world.
Women love and destroy peace in the name of love. Men want peace and destroy love for the sake of peace.
Thirteen. The more acquaintances, the more waste.
Fourteen. Learn to be annoyed when you hear your own praise. They don’t say such things seriously.
Learn to ignore when you hear your own criticism. They don’t say such things knowingly.
You know what you are. Whatever anyone says beyond or below that doesn’t apply to you.
Fifteen. An idle man gradually becomes inhuman. So beware of idle men!
Sixteen. Whoever you chase after, you’ll remain behind them for life.
Consider this carefully.
Seventeen. Even when you lovingly seat someone by the fire, it feels good, but when you mistakenly carry them on your head, it becomes uncomfortable.
Eighteen. Some people are like footballs—the moment you see them, you feel like kicking them, and if you can’t kick them, a kind of guilt sets in. Do those who kick them and keep kicking ever think what it would feel like if they had to spend their lives being kicked like innocent footballs? They don’t think about it; because they cannot understand how much more painful it is to be kicked without reason. Religion exists in their beliefs, not in their actions.
In this world, there are only three types of people: footballs, football players, and spectators.
Nineteen. Take your beating with a full belly,
Cry with your teeth bared.
Twenty. How much suffering there is for humans in this world! When someone is in pain, the entire world seems painful to them. Suffering makes a person’s world smaller. And joy makes the world much larger. This is why happy people have a bigger world.
When there is suffering, a person is alone in that world of pain. Even if they want to, they cannot share that suffering with anyone, nor can anyone take it from them. But joy can easily be shared. If people could give away some portion of their suffering to others, many who are now in graves would still be alive today.
Suffering burns people—some are burned into gold, others into ash.
Twenty-one. You can embrace someone to your chest, but you cannot give them a place at your feet.
. . . Out of fear!
If you must bless, then so be it.
Twenty-two. No one forgets, the need simply expires.
Twenty-three. : What is suffering?
: That from which one can learn.
: Then what is that which makes one cry?
: Weakness.
Twenty-four. If you spend your life laughing, you learn nothing.
If you spend your life crying, you also learn nothing.
If you want to learn something in life, you must bow your head and sit at the teacher’s feet.
Who is the greatest teacher?
Sorrow.
Who is the worst teacher?
Happiness.
Twenty-five. The sorrow of becoming poor is far less than the sorrow of falling from wealth to poverty.
Twenty-six. Is your boyfriend wanting to break up after becoming a BCS cadre?
Is your girlfriend wanting to break up after becoming a BCS cadre?
Agree immediately! Don’t carelessly waste such a golden opportunity! Because God loves you, He has cleverly made your partner a BCS cadre to save you for life from the hands of a world-class deceiver. Business is one thing, love is another.
(Thank me later.)
Twenty-seven. The greatest enemy of creative people is the absence of solitude.