You want to get to know me. That’s wonderful. I love making new friends. A new friend means getting acquainted with another human being whose good qualities I can respect. I truly enjoy respecting people, genuinely do. I respect people and value their position. Those who have gotten to know me, who have spent time with me—I believe they would agree with this. If you’ve had a different experience, I’m telling you straight up: write it in the comments, I won’t mind at all. Let me give you my number. This number is quite old. Many people know it. I have no problem sharing it, but that doesn’t mean you should consider it your personal property and do whatever you please with it. Just like you, I too have a personal life. Just as you get annoyed when someone contacts you in an irritating manner, so do I. When you’re sitting with family or friends enjoying a meal, and someone wants to chat with you for ten minutes without any particular need, what would you say? Wouldn’t you ask them to call back later? We should treat others the way we expect to be treated. I travel around quite a bit. I meet so many people, roam with them, sit and eat with them. This doesn’t bother me at all. Whoever you are, your position and dignity are no less important to me. I remember when I went to Rajshahi, while traveling around in a car, I surprised everyone by waiting almost an hour for a senior friend of mine who was illiterate, a tailor by profession, and couldn’t even speak well. But his greatest quality was that he knew how to love. I met him in Dhaka through another friend. Since then, he often calls me and asks about my well-being. Why he does this, I don’t know. He thinks I’m a good person, a great person. This notion is quite dangerous. When someone thinks highly of you, the danger is that you can never do anything small in front of them. There’s also pain in being unable to be petty. Sometimes I want to be petty too. Like everyone else, I’m desperate for love. If someone just gives me love, I could give my life for them. I don’t want anyone to call me just to fulfill their own interests. When they call, they should at least ask if I’m well. If any of my words ever bring them even a little happiness, they should at least mention that much. If I’ve helped someone in some way, they should at least give a dry thank you for that… Are you thinking I’m speaking cheaply, without any grandeur? Well then, who isn’t cheap like this? Many don’t say it and pretend to be noble; I say it outright—I don’t like pretending to be all noble and such. That’s all! I can’t tolerate hypocrisy. What’s in my mind, I say. I can’t tolerate hypocrites either, not one bit! Am I a devil, a scoundrel, a bastard? Very good. Please know me that way, not differently. I’ll be spared the discomfort.
Every week I have to spend at least 15-20 hours talking with some people who are feeling down, who believe they’ll find peace by talking to me. When someone is in great pain, feeling depressed, have you ever tried saying a couple of kind words to them? I know—you didn’t feel like it, or didn’t have time, or you thought: who are they to me that I should give them my time? I often have to write countless words in inboxes and emails to cheer someone up, to help them find some meaning in staying alive. In career sessions, I talk for hours, I write for them on Facebook. Many want to meet and talk, to share their mental anguish, to hear a few good words from me. Honestly, it’s very painful to do all this. Why don’t you give some of your busy daily time to someone completely selflessly! See how it feels! Have you ever reached out to pull up some lost soul other than your boyfriend or girlfriend? You write so much. Why not write a couple of lines for them! Allah has given you so much. Why not give away some of this gift! You’ve received more than what you deserve anyway. Have you ever wondered why you’ve received it? How much do you really need to live? Let others live a little too! Teach them a little wisdom about how to survive! I too have to work at the office, spend time at home, read books, watch movies, listen to music, travel around, write. Just like you! Beyond all this, I do these thankless jobs of eating at home and chasing buffaloes in the forest. Why do I do it? Because I know how terrible it feels to be depressed, when all the world’s sorrows weigh on your head, how difficult it is to spend night after sleepless night! They assume they’ll find a little happiness in my words. Tell me, at that moment, no matter how tired the body is, don’t you have to forget that fatigue and talk? Can you turn away someone who’s feeling down? And then I can’t even get a little angry at your rude behavior? How is this possible!
You have my number. You wanted to get acquainted, so you called. Where did you call? On Viber—where the conversation comes in fits and starts, talking feels annoying, and it doesn’t cost any money to talk. It’s not like there’s a network problem on mobile or you’re outside the country. Yet you gave your first call to someone you want to get acquainted with on Viber. Or you just went ahead and made a video call on IMO! You tell me, what does this mean? I keep cutting the call, and even this doesn’t penetrate your thick skull to understand that I’m busy or getting extremely annoyed—you just keep calling, keep calling! On WhatsApp, the first time you knock, you send a selfie or something I have no reason to care about but you care about! Why should I like that? Would you do it if you were in my place? Brother, don’t you feel ashamed? Or do you have so little common sense that you don’t want to spend even that much? If needed, text me and say you’re a street beggar who doesn’t have money for regular mobile calls; I promise I’ll make the call myself. I beg you, please don’t annoy me this way. There’s a courtesy to getting acquainted with someone. Following it makes things convenient for you and for me too. I’m not your buddy, your pal, or your childhood friend. What sense does it make for you to video call me? Wouldn’t your mood turn sour if someone gave you a video call as their first call? I’ve never felt even the slightest interest in talking to any guy face-to-face on a mobile screen over the network. Why are some people so clueless? Why do some people seem to just wait for when they’ll be blocked? Some people make their very first call for getting acquainted after midnight. What does this mean? I say, brother, what would it cost to use a little sense? And they also say, “Brother, you’re awake anyway, what’s the problem with talking?” I feel like saying, “Do I have to give you an explanation of what my problem is? Who are you? I don’t even know you! Why did you assume that I’m sitting here with eager anticipation to chat with you after midnight? Especially a first-time acquaintance chat?” Boy-to-boy midnight phone conversations are not my area of interest. Sorry!
Some strangers (or perhaps acquaintances) call from unknown numbers, then stay silent without saying anything. What’s the problem, brother? Can’t you say what you want to say? No courage? If you don’t have courage, why did you call? Don’t people have work to do? If needed, swear at me; if you want, just say “I love you”—no problem at all. Honestly, no problem. Don’t I want to hear “I love you” too? But please don’t call and stay silent. Please! I can’t stand cowardly types. Besides, I stay very busy! So it’s annoying; how many numbers can you block! And even if I’m free, why should I give you time when I don’t know you? I’m past the age of cleverly getting acquainted and falling in love! I no longer have that adolescent curiosity, time, or patience. I don’t feel any attraction or aversion toward completely unknown people. Rather, when someone bothers me unnecessarily, what’s born is intense irritation! Sometimes I see some people still give missed calls. Haven’t call rates come down a lot? Does it still cost 7 taka per minute now? Missed calls from numbers I don’t recognize. Tell me, how does that spoil the mood? What’s the problem, brother? Can’t I swear?
Two days ago, hearing that I was coming to Sylhet, an unknown well-wisher(!) sent me a text message. What was in it? The text writer congratulated me on coming to Sylhet. (Didn’t bother asking how I was doing.) The very next line was: “I’ve done terribly on this 35th BCS exam. I’m so happy that you’ve come to Sylhet—now I can get advice from you about the 36th BCS exam. You’ll give me all the details on how to prepare.” Reading the message, I was deeply annoyed. What’s this, friend—don’t I seem human to you? Do I only appear to be a cadre? Am I obligated to help you? Or did I come rushing to Sylhet just to help you? Is this how one asks for help? There’s another type who calls and their very first words are: “Brother, help me make a decision about such-and-such matter.” Whether I’m busy or not, whether I have enough time to spare at that moment, whether I’m in the middle of chatting with friends—they don’t need to think about any of that. And if I politely ask them to call back later, they even get angry! What strange creatures!! They’ve passed their honors degree but still don’t know basic manners! I wish such blockheads wouldn’t enter civil service! Seeing them, the public thinks all civil servants are ‘jerks’!
In childhood, I read something incorrect: cows give us milk. (How absurd! Why would cows give milk? Do cows have nothing better to do?) The truth is: we cleverly make cows give us milk.