The Afternoon Nest

: My heart's rhythm rests with you. Don't breathe so hard, I can't bear it! I lie against your chest like a wounded bird.
: Don't cry, I can't stand to see tears in your eyes.
: You'll never call me close again, I know. Even knowing this, my thirst grows to hold you tight against one side of my chest. I'm deeply sorry for how I've behaved. Forgive me if you can. I never wanted to be your beloved—I only wanted to linger in your gaze.
: I haven't gone anywhere. 'I am here.'
: I'm willing to do anything to bring you into my imagination. Without your presence, I can't write—everything feels suffocating.
: How beautifully you write!
: It's impossible without you, the task is terribly difficult. I'm no writer, after all.

: (Who's there?
 At some unexpected moment,
 -------------------------------)
How does this piece read? Feel it and tell me. It couldn't be written quickly—it took 72 hours.
: Why did you write with such a fever?
: Because I wanted so much to love you, to cherish you! That's why. How did you know I wasn't well?
: I sense many things.
: And me? How much have I understood about you?
: Frighteningly much! I'd forgotten many things about myself that your writing reminded me of.
: I miss you terribly, Neer. If you call me to you, I'll drop everything and come to you this instant. Believe me.
: I know. I read that piece of yours again from the other day. It felt like everything of yours, all your writing, is completely a piece of 'us.'

: Will you say 'good morning' to me another day?
: Good afternoon, silly.
: I'd fallen asleep.
: My silly one.
: You're a very strange person, not easy to understand. What I've grasped, how much I've thought—it's not enough. To me you're not 'goodbye,' you're not 'memory'—you're simply 'alive'! You're a precious 'moment' kept carefully within my chest.
: You're far stranger than I am.

: Don't punish me anymore, I'm exhausted. Do I bother you terribly?
: What are you saying! Why would I be bothered? You're such a dear child.
: Are you well?
: I exist in my own way.
: You work, I'll watch you. I love watching you like this.
: Come into my lap! Let me hold you while I write.
: Oh, you fool!

: Little one, how are you?
: I don't know. I thought of you last night.
: I know, I could tell.
: Do you think of me sometimes too?
: I think of you often—this isn't 'sometimes.' Come into my chest.
: After so long, you've asked me to come into your chest, Neer!
: Go to sleep, holding you against my chest brings such peace. I can never forget those moments.
: You know, sometimes I suddenly catch your scent, and sleep comes. I'm catching it even now.
: Hallucination!
: Why does this happen?
: I am you, you are me. That's why.

: Silly, I need you.
: If you don't let me go, I'll stay with you.
: Promise me!
: Truly, I want to spend the rest of time with you. You're someone I'm terribly fond of.
: I've been missing you these past few days. I feel like if you were in my life, I'd find peace. I need you, stay always, all right?
: Ha ha! What if I say—'I'm entirely yours'?

: Silly, what's wrong with you? Why are you so quiet? You write so well! How wonderful this turned out!
: You read it?
: Of course I read it.
: Then you can never return—even while reading, you'll remain within me.

: Do you remember our moments of touching, Neer?
: Why wouldn't I? I've never touched anyone as deeply as I've touched you, not until today.

: Ever since I scolded you that day, you've forgotten me completely!
: Silly....

: Reply if you don't want a slap!
: Did you look for me? Come, I love you.
: Don't go, stay. If you leave I'll kill you! Don't let any of my words upset you. It's just me, no one else! So don't be upset.
: I was hurt, it pained me.
: Oh silly! What pain? I'm here! Never be sad. I'm here, come this way. I don't like it when you sulk. You're not here in front of me that I can break your anger with affection! Come to my chest.
: You are a love.