Signs of Melancholy

All around us, the parade of suicides grows longer. Let us become aware, let us learn to recognize the signs in those suffering from despair.

If you notice that your ebullient, perpetually smiling friend has suddenly gone quiet, look into it. Even the brightest lamp grows dim and fades before it burns out.

Be alert if someone close to you—someone you always saw singing, writing, dancing, or drawing, someone who couldn't live without these pursuits—suddenly abandons them. Creative people cannot survive without their art. If a vibrant person falls silent without reason you can fathom, if a familiar artist stops living with their art, then understand this clearly: the person has died inside, and given the chance, they will separate their soul from their body.

If someone you know or love has suddenly or gradually reduced contact with everyone close to them—friends, family—or has cut off completely, go to them and check. They may want everyone else to learn to live without them; they may have already plotted their escape from life.

Check whether your unemployed friend is suffering terrible financial hardship. Notice whether someone close to you is being crushed by work pressures. Keep watch over whether your sister or wife is suffering domestic abuse without your knowledge. No one wants to die unless living becomes unbearably difficult.

Perhaps each of them has given up hope in their hearts, and finding no escape, no hand of friendship, they will petition death to flee from life. What life turns away, death wants to embrace. If you just extend your hand a little, many can be saved from drowning. With just a bit of help in pulling them up, some find their way back from being lost.

Instead of mourning someone for a whole year after they die, try crying for them just once while they're still alive. Your tears after someone's death mean nothing to the deceased, but while that person is still living—your assistance, a few compassionate words, help in making decisions, or simply listening to what they have to say—might save them from something like suicide.

If you have means, lend your unemployed friend money occasionally without conditions. Hold them close and say, "Tell me if you need more money, I'll give what I can. Don't worry, I'm here for you."

To the sister whose shoulders you've burdened with domestic responsibilities, forcing her into marriage, just place your hand on her shoulder once and say, "I'm here. Leave that household and come back home."

To your dear one who suffers from work pressure and can't sleep day or night, hold their hands firmly and say, "Life itself is more precious, not the job. Leave the job if you must—God will surely provide something new."

Even if you must endure the harsh behavior of someone you know who's suffering from depression, call them repeatedly, earn their trust, listen patiently to the words they cannot speak. Don't judge people as long as blood flows through their veins.

That's it! Just this much! Even this small bit of support can bring a person back from the brink of suicide.

Even the deepest night of fierce storms eventually sees dawn, and torrents that submerge islands in flood will ebb when their time comes. You just need to plant a strong post to stand firm through the dark night, you need a moored boat at shore to keep from being swept away.

Become that post yourself—one that won't break even in violent spring storms. Become that boat that the current cannot drag under and drown. You'll find that living feels wonderfully good.

Life, like tides, will surely end one day, but in the untimely flood, let no dragonfly be swept away and lost.