Rehabilitation of Understanding

You wanted to know what had gathered in my satchel of achievements.
I'm telling you, listen.
Whatever is forbidden in this world, scorned by society, against custom,
every boundary of civilization transgressed—
all of it is lawful to me.
I nurture these things with utmost care,
I can go against society, civilization, caste, religion, even the world itself with perfect ease,
in that lies my peace and joy!

Are you shocked? Perhaps you're readying yourself inwardly, planning quite a lecture, right?
Maybe you're thinking how shamefully I'm blurting all this out?
Will you turn your face away and flee right now?

Wait, wait! Rest a moment!
If you ever see your three-year-old daughter crying,
can you still laugh then?

Suppose all the rules of this world decree
that even hearing your child's tears, you must smile!
Could you do it then, tell me?
Wouldn't your heart long to throttle all those rules
and take your child's share of sorrow?
Wouldn't you want to sell everything you own
to buy even a fragment of laughter?
What would become of the world then? Where would civilization go? How would religion's wheels turn?
Wouldn't your chest tremble even slightly at auctioning your entire race?

What you call your child
is merely a burden to many others!
Yes, in this very country... this very country it has happened!
How many have sold their own children and bought food
with bellies burning from hunger!

Maybe you're thinking this isn't such a big deal? You'll just laugh it off!
What? Does hearing this pierce you too deeply?
What seems unbearable to you
might well be happiness to someone else!
Isn't that right, tell me?
Then why do you want to drown everything to buy a sliver of smile?
Shouting about rules and regulations, have you become such a beggar after all!

I only spoke of laughing a little, and even that distresses you so!
What's this! Such a learned person you are,
if your armor is so flimsy,
what will you strike your blows with?
Who will build civilization by patting sentiment's back, tell me!

Crumpling each confession of gradual self-destruction with both hands and hurling it away,
for humanity's welfare, the pen must be taken up again!
Today the voice must be raised loud and we must declare,
these are the sin-marks of this nation, the curse of disgrace!

First purify yourself in an ocean of tears,
only then descend to such work of social cleansing!
Only after gouging out everything the heart finds before the eyes
and drinking blood by the handful will the path of righteousness be perfected, isn't that right, tell me!

Never ask me to be perfected in such a way,
what feels helpless to you feels exactly the same to me, you know!
Everything that is yours is like a child to me,
even if it's only ash and dust in this world!

Perhaps you're thinking, why have I gone outside the rules,
this is a grave injustice, punishment is all I deserve!
Society, civilization, caste... these very things breathed life into my lifeless body,
with what courage do I dare wish to live well against their current!
Peace, comfort... by what right shall I have these things!

Fine, let me accept it, yes, it's truly so,
when one becomes weak, one must make offerings... even to the unworthy!
I know all this quite well!

When time runs out, then
go up and tell the Creator,
perhaps a little mistake was made in the last life,
may He forgive this time!

Hear this final word,
keep the purest confession of forbidden love
saved just for me!
Then don't say again that society has chained you!

The society we lived in—was it built in your mind? Or in mine?