Pretending to believe is far harder than failing to love, I know.
Better that you hate me, but don't trouble yourself with acting, Obonish.
There's such ugly torment in it! It will burn you to ash.
Distrust of one's own is so terrible!
I was your own, wasn't I? Tell me.
I know you, even if you never knew me.
I know this torment will gnaw you hollow.
So I say, better erase me from your life,
hurl me as far as you can,
abandon me in some crowd and board a passing train,
let the ocean waves carry me away—don't even look back.
Or else, try believing once more—
you'll discover how fragile your distrust was.
You'll realize what a fatal mistake you were making, leaving me!
Drive another nail into trust's coffin...harder this time.
How much longer can you go on trustless?
Rest a little now,
or you'll surely be finished, Obonish.
Tell me, who has ever touched peace standing on a heap of distrust?