Memory-Making

 
Never come to me against your heart's inclination.
Whether you come to me or not—
my sincerity toward you doesn't depend on that.


Though sometimes thinking of you leaves me restless,
I know my boundaries, the distance I must keep, and I accept it.


I will never stand before you claiming any right.
Our relationship will move forward only as we both wish,
when time and opportunity allow.
I will simply remember: I love you.


And I know well enough—the pain belongs only to me!
You never asked me to suffer for loving you!
I love because I cannot help but love you!


My countless grievances find not a single word,
my aches quickly forget their own cries,
the long sighs of all hours I nurture within my chest,
and finally, I remember, in this brief journey of being alive—
that I must stay well, help some people stay well too.


You are far above so much else in my life.
Where is there room here for demands, complaints, reproaches?


To stay well with myself
I once stepped away from all relationships.
How far I've walked alone with myself—
no one else should know, and no one will.


The decision to walk this path alone was mine,
so the responsibility for staying well or ill with myself
is entirely mine too.


My world isn't as colorful as yours.
Here, unspoken sorrows must be swallowed by rule,
then one must prepare for whatever comes next.


I will live only a few more days, so much work still remains—
in this time, lift some burden from my heart.


Even thinking as far as you brings me joy,
I have such enchantment for you that I can forget
the rest of the world.
Stay as long as you wish. Leave when you wish.


I'm in no hurry to go anywhere, no hurry to return.
No desire to hold anyone back, or to be held back by anyone.


The journey from event to memory doesn't take long—
so in each present moment I stay busy
building some happy memories.