Love, and Love Too

One. Love is the only truth in this world through which a person becomes rich by giving, and becomes a beggar by withholding. No one is more wretched than the person who cannot love anyone. It is not the one unloved by others who is alone; it is the one incapable of loving anyone at all who walks in solitude.

Two. Romance may exist without love, but love always contains romance—and far more besides. There one finds paradise wearing the face of hell, and hell adorned as paradise; both can appear in the same breath. So many other things emerge in love that no one has yet perfectly discovered them, nor does it seem likely they ever will. I cannot speak with certainty of other matters, but this much is sure: if expectation dwells in love, suffering dwells there too. There is only one way to find happiness in love—to love someone without expectation.

Three. Those two are the most wretched of people: those who talk only of their own hearts' desires, never giving the other a chance to speak. Yet if one learns to listen well, the path to becoming a true lover becomes remarkably simple. People prefer far more to be heard than to hear; they prefer far more the one who listens to them than the one they listen to.

Four. Whether you truly love someone reveals itself most plainly in how you regard others' treatment of your beloved. That very flaw you freely criticize and correct in your own person—if someone else, however gracefully, points out that same fault, you will find it nearly impossible to accept.

Five. Love is the binding of two souls. Bodies can be separated; souls cannot. Therefore, even if you never possess the person you love in this life, the pull toward them never fades away.

Six. The beginning of romance may rest in your hands, but once love takes root, its governance slips beyond your control. Romance can be steered by will and whim, but love obeys no such commands.