Just Surviving

1.
: There is more joy in destroying life than there is in creating it.
: Who told you that?
: Most people end their own lives with their own hands. They wouldn't do it if there were no joy in it!

2.
: You've reached your destination, yet your heart remains heavy?
: Once you arrive, what will people run after? Why would they even go on living?

3.
: I see you weeping every day. Do people grieve like this all the time?
: Because I know—weep I surely must. So I shed my tears in advance, so that less suffering awaits me later.

4.
: What can I do to become like you?
: Rather than wish to be like me, you'd do better to wish for death. It would be easier.

5.
: Where did you hide all that hatred?
: In my tears. I wipe them away in the deep night, so you never saw it.

6.
: Why can't we be happy?
: Because we actually want to be unhappy—that's why happiness never comes.

7.
: What does it feel like to be loved?
: Perhaps it doesn't feel good; because I have never received love, only given it. Giving love feels a certain way, but receiving it surely cannot be quite so sweet.

8.
: How do you stay alive with all this pretense?
: As long as there is life, there is pretense.

9.
: I think I alone am the one from whom nothing has come.
: Those from whom things have come still whisper in their hearts: why did it have to come through me?

10.
: What do you do now?
: I endure.