If I cannot have you

Had I not found you, love would never have been spoken this way.
Had I not found you, this blue sky would never have felt so much my own.
Had I not found you, I would never have traced lifelines in my card games to know your dwelling.
Had I not found you, shells would never have been gathered at the ocean's edge in this strange hour.
Had I not found you, forgetting the thorn's dominion, I would never have truly known the rose's color and the fragrance of its petals.
Had I not found you, love would never have been sought in the endless joy of these two eyes.
Had I not found you, there would be no place to rest my head against a strong chest.
Had I not found you, this night would never seem so still, so intimate.
Had I not found you, in every moonlight there would be no desire to rest my head on someone's shoulder without shame.
Had I not found you, there would be no wish to paint spring colors on this crumbling lime-washed wall of emotions.
Had I not found you, my body would not grow numb with that incurable disease of wanting to touch those sleep-tangled eyes with the tenderness of soft cheeks.
Had I not found you, in this spring I would never have seen destruction in those two eyes.
Had I not found you, there would be no sound of emotions secretly knocking on the mist-veiled glass of the window.
Had I not found you, in this noon or midnight, I would never have known to search for poetry in street tar or fireflies.
Had I not found you, I would never have claimed as my own the blood-red petal of the hibiscus.
Had I not found you, the spectacle of flame trees, silk cotton, and gulmohar would never be so truly thrilling.
Had I not found you, in night's darkness the birth story of the autumn moon would never have been written.
Had I not found you, this luxury of sorrow would never have been so carefully guarded.
Had I not found you, I would never have thought to calculate the merit of rebirth's blessed fruit.
Had I not found you, the festival of love's surgery in this chest would never have thickened into cream.
Had I not found you, I would never have learned to live by clinging to this fragile existence.
Had I not found you, I would never have embraced this weariness across my body with such tenderness.
Had I not found you, I would never have sought the dwelling of words in the silent eyes of a mute bride.
Had I not found you, I would never have kept account of this restlessness wrapped in a thousand years of busyness.
Had I not found you, I would never have been repossessed by the faithful story of staying alive.
Had I not found you, I would never have become so intoxicated with the passion of finding you.