Shashi: Greetings.
Would you add me as a friend? I can’t even send you a request. I really enjoy your writing. Of course, I don’t need to be your friend to read your work, since your pieces are open to everyone. Still, I’d like to be your friend—yes, my wanting it means nothing unless you want it too. It’s up to you now. Please,
accept me as your friend.
Finally, I’ll get to see you tomorrow. Just thinking about it makes me happy.
I never imagined I’d get to see you this close. In person, you look even better than in photographs.
I only learned about you a few days ago. And I never thought I’d actually get to see you in person. Today truly feels wonderful.
Brother, how do you write so beautifully? How do you explain such complex ideas so simply! Every time I read your writing, I fall in love with it all over again…I don’t know when you’ll read my messages, or if you’ll read them at all…maybe you will, or maybe you won’t…just days after learning about you, I never imagined I’d get to see you…you truly are extraordinary among the ordinary…
Happy Diwali…
I’m sending some photos, please take a look. I took pictures sitting beside the stage, so all the shots are from the side…I didn’t get any chance to photograph from the front…
Yamini:
I sent you a friend request.
Shashi: I accepted it…thank you so much.
I’m feeling so good!
The more I see you, the more I like you. And there’s no way to describe how I feel about your writing. I don’t know why, but I didn’t like it that much at first—yet day by day, my fondness keeps growing. Thank you for reaching your current position. Otherwise, I might never have known you. I wouldn’t have fallen in love with your writing. Whatever I say about you will never be enough. Even on the day of your seminar in Sylhet, I was uncertain whether I’d get to see you. I went at the very end, so I couldn’t find a seat in the audience section. I was feeling dejected and about to leave when I caught sight of you. I was waiting outside the closed doors with friends, and suddenly seeing you, for a moment I thought I must be dreaming! You went inside while I was still outside. Finally, a volunteer came and made some space for us. It turned out well that I couldn’t sit in the audience section—sitting beside the stage, I could see you much more closely. You always look handsome, but in person you’re even more so. Very fair-skinned,
perhaps a bit too much!
Hahahaha…though I didn’t like your shoes—somehow they didn’t suit your feet. Don’t ever wear shoes of that color again.
I’m giving you a bunch of wood apple flowers and a troop of red ants…
Yamini: It would have been nice to meet.
Shashi: I drew this.
How does it look?
Yamini: Wow!
Very beautiful!
Shashi: Thank you so much.
If I ever meet you again, I’ll give you this picture. I’ve never actually learned to draw, you know. I just try my hand at it now and then. Mother scolded me for drawing your portrait.
Yamini: The picture really is beautiful.
Shashi: Thanks thanks thanks! Hehehehe
If you like it, then my drawing was worth it. Drawing your portrait, the hardest part was getting your hair right. I couldn’t quite figure out the style.
Yamini: It turned out lovely.
Shashi: Hmm! You’re such a busy person. Send ten messages and get one reply back, but at least that’s something. I’m happy with that.
I have something for you. I’ll give it to you in a bit.
Yamini: Okay.
Shashi: Here. This is your birthday gift. The day you came to Sylhet, I thought I’d give it to you. Later I didn’t have the courage. So I’m giving it now. Hmm… this is also something I made. If you don’t like it, please don’t scold me!
Yamini: It’s absolutely beautiful. Really! Oh my! Why didn’t you give it then? Your name is lovely too.
Shashi: I didn’t have the courage to give it. Do you know my full name? Ashalata Hem Shashi. Listen, I’ll save all your gifts together. Next time you come to Sylhet, when we meet I’ll give them to you. Happy?
By the way, there’s one more thing. Wait. This letter. My handwriting isn’t very good though.
Listen, if I give you all these things, will you really accept them?
Yamini: Wonderful! When did you make all this?
Shashi: Hihihihi… I made them. You like them? Tell me honestly though!
Oh hello!
Yamini: I really really do.
Shashi: Hihihihi… good morning.
Hello! How are you? I want to talk with you. Will you talk with me?
I like you quite a lot… I feel like talking with you. Could you give me your phone number? Of course, that’s entirely up to you. Actually, let me do this. I’ll give you my number. I don’t know if you’ll call me or not, but I really want you to call me, because I don’t have your number. Listen, if you feel like it or if you don’t mind, then give me your number or call me. Please! *********** This is my number.
Will you read my message? Well, it’s up to you! I asked for your phone number—please don’t be angry!
Yamini: I don’t feel like giving my number. Don’t take it personally. Actually, give me some of your photos. Let me see.
Shashi: Wait, I’m sending them… Oh my goodness, I’ve sent you so many photos! There, have a look.
What happened after seeing the photos?
You wanted to see the photo, so I sent it. Now at least give me some kind of reply. I made a face at you.
Yamini: What should I say?
Shashi: Nothing.
Yamini: Just say it directly, it’ll be easier to understand.
Shashi: What should I say? I’ve already said everything I had to say.
Yamini: What was that?
Shashi: I want to talk with you.
Yamini: Why do you want to? What’s the point?
Shashi: I haven’t calculated the costs and benefits.
Yamini: Hmm.
Shashi: Leave the rest for now, maybe I’ll tell you later.
Yamini: Just say it.
Shashi: First tell me whether you’ll talk or not.
Yamini: You say that first.
Shashi: If you can, please read all the texts I’ve sent from the beginning till now. I think you’ll understand. Hehehehe………
Nothing, just saying. Have you read them?
Listen, if you feel like talking, just tell me. And if you don’t feel like it, then just tell me that you don’t want to talk with me.
So what do you say now?
Yamini: I’ll tell you in the evening.
Shashi: Why in the evening? Why not now? Tell me right now.
I’m sending you so many ants. They’ll bite you. Hehehehe………
A face for you! Go away!
Yamini: Good.
Shashi: Good meaning?
Yamini: Fine.
Shashi: Uff, I know that. The point is, I threatened to have you bitten by so many red ants, and you weren’t scared even a little bit! That’s not right! You should have been afraid.
Yamini: You’re right.
Shashi: Then be a little afraid now!
Yamini: I am!
Shashi: I know you’re not yet. There, I gave you red ants before, now I’m adding black ants too. Hehe……
Yamini: Child!
Shashi: Meaning? You’re still not scared?
Darn! You don’t get scared. Fine, I won’t try to scare you anymore.
Now I’ll give you fireflies. It’s nighttime now.
I’ve been waiting since morning, you know. You said you’d talk in the evening, now it’s become night. Talk now, or else tell me exactly what time tonight you’ll talk.
What happened? Won’t you say anything?
Hello hello
Hello hello!
Hasn’t evening come
for you yet?
You said it yourself—
you’d talk in the evening.
Now it’s nearly midnight,
won’t you say something!
I’ll set all those red ants
on you again to bite.
Won’t you say anything at all?
If you don’t say anything,
how will I understand?
Fine, whatever. Reply if you feel like it.
So many faces
making silly expressions just for you!
I drew this one too.
Yamini: It turned out
really beautiful.
Shashi: Really?
Oh, thanks!
Listen, I wanted to talk with you, but you didn’t say anything. You asked to see my drawings, so I sent them. Do you decide who to talk to and who not to talk to just by looking at pictures? If that’s how it is, then what’s the result in my case—will you tell me? I took the test, did I pass or fail? At least let me know that much!
Yesterday you said yourself
you’d talk in the evening, but you didn’t.
Is this right?
Hey, are you listening?
Won’t you talk to me
at all?
How do you write
so beautifully?
I really want to talk with you! Please, will you talk with me a little?
Yamini: Why?
Shashi: I don’t know
why, but I really want to.
Won’t you talk
with me?
Could you give me
your phone number?
This is my final
text:
I like you very much, that’s why I wanted to talk. But maybe you just don’t want to talk with me. Yes, that’s natural. But the heart of a woman—why should it accept what’s natural? The thing is, you could have at least told me once that you don’t want to talk with me. Yes, I know you’re very busy, but still I thought maybe you’d give me a little time. You’re not talking, but you’re not saying ‘no’ to me either. The other day you told me yourself that you’d let me know in the evening whether you’d talk with me or not. But you didn’t let me know anything. This probably wasn’t right. Anyway, there’s no point beating around the bush. The simple truth is, I like you. Maybe you’ll see this message, or maybe you won’t see it at all. That’s completely up to you. I’ve said what I had to say, the rest is your business. This is all I had to say, and I’ve said it. I’ll say it again—I like you.
……………………………………………………………………………
Hello hello
hello hello hello…………….
I want to talk with you,
please give me your number!
Or since I gave you my number, will you call me once, please?
Please please
please!
I’m in love…..At the time of twilight, I feel you like fresh
air. Sometimes, lunar eclipse falls deeply on my mind…….That time I feel
alone…….my world becomes empty. When I think about you, my mind gets full of
love and respect. Sometimes I feel like a mermaid and, I swim somewhere that
feels like the lake of love. In my leisure I think only about you and you……In
my dusk time I sing hymn for you…….Sometimes I feel, in darkness, a new sun
rises only for you………and I feel you only you………I’m in love…….I’m in
love……I’m in love……..
I wrote this.
There are mistakes here and there, I know. Well,
how is it, errors and all?
I probably made you
uncomfortable by asking for your number. Okay, sorry. It wasn’t right of me to
ask for your number so suddenly like that. It’s better to just chat on
Facebook. Please reply whenever you get the time and opportunity.
Listen, I talk so much, but you never say anything. At least say hi or
hello or something! You can talk, can’t you? Then why don’t you say anything? I
know you’re a very busy person, but I hope you have enough free time to reply!
Please say something. Well, if nothing else, just scold me a little. But please
say something.
So many funny faces at
you!
I call you so much on
Messenger, why don’t you ever pick up? What would happen if you talked to me? Just
a little?
What can I say to you!
I read your piece “Life of Snakes and Ladders” a little while ago. After
reading it, I can’t figure out what I should say. Without your own inner
willpower, you probably couldn’t have become capable of writing something like
this. I don’t know what to say, I can’t figure it out, but I feel like saying
something. There was a time when I used to get depressed suddenly. Since the
day I saw you, the frequency of my depression has been decreasing. I don’t come
to Facebook specifically to read your writing, but whenever I do come to
Facebook, I always visit your wall once………..
I don’t know why, but
my fondness for you keeps growing day by day. Before seeing you in person, I
saw you in dreams. Let me tell you about the dream. The night before you came
to Sylhet, I dreamed that your visit to Sylhet was cancelled. Even after waking
up, I couldn’t understand that I had been dreaming. In the afternoon, I clearly
realized that I had dreamed it and it wasn’t true. The dream itself seemed real
to me. When I couldn’t join the seminar because I was late, I thought the dream
had actually come true. I felt very sad. All my friends wanted to leave, but I
convinced them to stay, saying that since we’d already come this far, I
wouldn’t go back without at least catching a glimpse of you.
I suddenly realized you were there! I couldn’t believe you were actually standing before my eyes! It was only because I waited a while that I had the good fortune to watch the program…..When I came home that day, I told my mother about you. I even showed her your photograph. My mother laughed when she heard what I said. I laughed too. Sometimes I act so childish, and then I’m surprised at myself—I feel like such a kid. I have hardly any interest in studies, you could say, though story books are a different matter. Let me tell you a secret. Like everyone else, I too want a good job. Besides that, I have another goal—to have a family. Don’t laugh! I had no idea how much I needed to meet you until we actually met. Thank you so very much. You probably won’t even read what I’ve written. And if you do, it might seem meaningless to you, or just plain childish. But I felt like telling you these childish thoughts of mine, so I did. You are wonderful!
Hello! I miss you sometimes, terribly. Why don’t you reply?
Today in ‘Prothom Alo,’ on the ‘Dreams’ page, there was a picture of you from your career chat at Chittagong University. My picture is there too, under the headline ‘The Green Heart of MC College.’ It feels good to think that where your picture appears, mine has found a place too.
Won’t you talk to me? Well, what would happen if you replied just a little?
Hi! You don’t look at my messages anymore. And even if you do, you don’t reply. You deliberately don’t reply to me, isn’t that right? Why do you treat me this way?
You didn’t call, didn’t answer either. Why? Have you forgotten? Or is forgetting just an excuse not to talk? What would happen if you talked, tell me? I’m not a tiger or a bear that I’d devour you if you spoke! I’m angry, you know, though I know you couldn’t care less about my anger.
I’m making this many faces at you!
Hello! How are you? You’re coming to Sylhet in just two days. That card I made for you and the picture I drew of you—I said I’d give them to you. You said you’d take them too. I want to give them to you—how should I do it? Please tell me! I’m probably bothering you. Sorry!
How are you? Did my drawings turn out like cartoons?
Hello! Happy New Year!
You don’t need to say anything, good or bad. I drew them as best I could. I like to draw, so I drew them.
Jamini: Do you love to travel?
Shashi: What if I do? How are you? By the way, did you see the pictures?
I love you! Any objections?
What happened? Why didn’t you say anything?
I want to tell you something. I love you. I’ve been dying to say it, so I just did. If I die tomorrow, I won’t get another chance to say it.
Listen, do you know how many words we carry buried in our hearts when we suddenly drop dead?
Yamini: You love me, I know that!
Shashi: Well! That’s good! Now you tell me. If you love me, say “I love you.” And if you don’t, just say “I don’t love you.”
What happened? Say something!
I want to know!
What’s wrong? Why won’t you say anything?
Why aren’t you saying anything? Please, just say something!
Yamini: I don’t love you.
Shashi: Alright, thank you. How are you?
Haven’t gone to sleep yet?
When will you visit Sylhet again? Next time you come,
you must visit our house. I cook really well. Your invitation…….
Yamini: I’ll definitely come!
Shashi: Thank you for accepting the invitation. When will you come to Sylhet?
I miss you terribly. This short little life of mine, and I’m wasting it missing the wrong person! Does that make any sense?
Listen, why won’t you talk to me? Are you afraid of me? I’m not a tiger, I’m not a bear. Why are you so reluctant to talk?
Yamini: Meow!
Shashi: Meow meow! I said so much, and that’s your reply!
Now I’m sure you’re afraid of me! Hehehe don’t be scared, don’t be scared,
I won’t hurt you……..I’ve forgotten the next line. By the way, who wrote this poem? Is it a poem or a rhyme? What’s the difference between poetry and rhymes?
Won’t you say anything, cat?
Listen, if you don’t want me around, I can’t exactly steal you away from yourself, can I? So why all this secretiveness about talking? Such a secretive little……..
Is it because I’m not beautiful that I don’t even have the right to talk to you?
I see………..
Does everything in this world belong to the beautiful? Everything in this world belongs to the wicked, everything in this world belongs to the beautiful! Oh my!
Look, I’m not trying to sweet-talk you or anything, what harm would a little hello here and there do to you?
You’re really awful! Next time I see you, I’m going to release red ants all over you.
Can anyone really talk to themselves, tell me? You’re so secretive, won’t say a word, you secretive thing!
Take care.
Does it really bother you that much to talk to me?
Sometimes I long to talk with you. But you won’t pick up the phone, so we never do talk.
Hmm… you probably won’t reply to anything I say, maybe won’t even read this, yet here I am talking to myself… there’s a kind of joy in this too. Am I really talking to you, or am I just talking to my own heart and giving my foolish mind some comfort? People are so strange, and women are stranger than people!
Please don’t be annoyed!
You write beautifully, speak beautifully too. But what you’re truly like beyond this writing and speaking—you haven’t given me the right to know that. So I don’t know. Maybe I never will. Still, I long to know.
You don’t have to reply. I’m enjoying writing to you, so I’m writing.
Have you ever seen baby mice? Tiny little ones… if you haven’t, you should. They’re so endearing. You wouldn’t have the heart to kill them.
Now I’m going to gift you some flowers. I mean, I’ll just say the names. Chalata blossoms, kamranga flowers, jarul, morning glory. Now you’ll have to bring these flowers to yourself on my behalf.
All day today I felt such pain thinking of you. I can’t even give you flowers! How useless I am! I wanted to give you flowers and instead I told you to go get them yourself! So this evening I went out and bought some flowers. Brought them home and put them in water in a vase. These flowers are for you. Tuberose, gladiola, chrysanthemum, yellow roses. Do you like them? Maybe you’ll never accept this gift of mine, but just imagining you’ve taken them makes me so happy. Perhaps I have no right to expect more than this. I’m poor, and the poor find joy just in dreaming! Why does this tenderness for you keep growing? You’re not mine, never will be. Is that why it grows?
If you see my writings in the morning, you’ll probably be very annoyed. You’ll think, all this meaningless chatter. When I wake up in the morning and see how much I’ve written, I’ll be annoyed with myself too. Morning thoughts for the morning—for now I’m not annoyed with myself, so I’m writing away!
How are you? I really like your parents. I like your mother especially. I don’t know why I like her.
One thing worked out well—you’re not online right now. So I can write fearlessly. Though you’ve never scolded me, I actually quite like being scolded. But not everyone has the right to scold me. You can scold me if you want—I’m giving you the right to scold me. Maybe you’re too well-mannered to scold. If it were someone else… but after seeing all these messages, you’ll give me a mental scolding at least, I’m sure! And I want you to scold me!
Oh, I see,
I’ve given you guava blossoms and golden shower flowers too. (I actually picked these two flowers and placed them on my reading table.) I certainly don’t lack courage. Look how much I’m chattering away. I should have met you much earlier, or else much later. Meeting you now was completely wrong timing. We meet the wrong person at the wrong time. What can be done about it? Tell me, you don’t find my words somehow silly, do you? Let them be silly if they are.
I’ve heard you sing, but I haven’t heard you recite poetry. Would you recite something for me? I’d love to hear it. I’ll sing for you and recite poetry too, if I ever get the chance.
Give me a good scolding in the morning, then I won’t write to you anymore, but if you don’t scold me, I’ll just keep writing like this………hehehehehe……..making all these faces at you…….
That post you shared about marriage—I don’t think I’ve read any other post as many times as I’ve read this one in these past two days. Every time I read it, I felt as if I had written those words myself. You’ve written exactly what’s in my heart. That’s exactly how a wife should be. I was truly amazed reading this piece. How did your thoughts match mine so perfectly? I can’t understand it.
I don’t know if you believe me, but God knows, your words matched everything in my heart! It’s amazing to think about, and it feels wonderful too.
I don’t know why it feels so good.
You live alone, don’t you? Living alone in a house isn’t right. Try to keep someone with you. You never know what troubles might arise. Try to stay careful and keep yourself healthy.
How are you these days?
For some reason I feel like your days are going badly now for one reason or another. Your mood probably gets spoiled suddenly. Whatever you don’t want to happen, that’s probably what’s happening.
The coming days will be very good for you, you’ll see! I’m just saying what came to my mind. My feeling might be wrong too. It would be good if I’m wrong. I quite enjoy reading the comments on your status updates, but when someone crosses the limit of joking around, it really feels awful.
Tell me, are you unwell most of the time? You said in one of your status updates that you would take care of your body, that you wouldn’t neglect even small matters. But maybe you are neglecting them!
Try to be a little more conscious about yourself.
Good morning!
Hello! How are you?
It’s more fun to ride an open Ferris wheel than a boxed-in one. Life—whoever wants to ride the boxed-in Ferris wheel, it puts them on the open one; whoever wants to ride the open Ferris wheel, it puts them on the boxed-in one!…….I should go wandering around with you………then at least I could ride the Ferris wheel……..
I feel like annoying you so much! Tell me, how should I go about annoying you?
Hey hey hey hey hey
Hey hey hey hey hey hey hey……….Why won’t you talk? Honestly, I’m not a tiger or a bear or anything. You don’t need to be scared of me!
Yamini: What are you doing?
Shashi: Right now?
Yamini: Mm-hmm.
Shashi: Watching the sunset. So, what does sunset look like to you?
Yamini: Send me a selfie.
Shashi: There you go. Now you send me one too, then we’ll be even.
Thank you so much. Now do you believe I’m not a tiger, not a bear, but a human being! Hahahaha………
The most annoying thing in the world is hanging up a mosquito net. I’ve decided I’ll only marry a guy who knows how to hang mosquito nets. Hey you, do you know how to hang mosquito nets? Ugh!
These are two selfies from yesterday. I took them for you. Didn’t send them then. Sending them now. Making faces!
Won’t you say anything?
I called you last night, even though I knew you wouldn’t pick up, but still! Yes, I made a mistake. So what? People always make these kinds of mistakes knowingly, and on top of that, I’m a girl!
Hey hey hey hey hey hey hey boy! Why do you keep saying “beautiful beautiful” all the time? There’s a saying about beautiful women. It goes…….never mind, I won’t say it. Let me tell you something. From now on, instead of looking for someone beautiful, look for someone with a beautiful heart. That would be better.
And yeah, you’re actually one step below handsome yourself. What do you think you are, huh?
Awful guy, always looking for beautiful girls! Hurting the feelings of not-so-beautiful ones. That’s not right! You awful guy!
One thing’s quite nice though. I can say whatever I want to you, no fear, because you’re not my college professor who’d cut my exam marks or complain about me to my parents. Hehehehe
Hey you, you fool! Why won’t you talk?
Listen, will you send me one of your selfies every day?
Hey hey hey hey hey hey hey!!!
Where’s the selfie? Send it!
What happened? Won’t you send a picture?
Hey you! Where are you? I’m missing you really badly!
You were supposed to send me a selfie! Why didn’t you?
Actually, why did you ask for my selfie that day? I asked for yours because I really like you, but why did you ask?
Why do you neglect yourself sometimes? If you didn’t neglect yourself, you certainly wouldn’t be falling ill like this. This isn’t right. Your aunt and uncle are unwell—at least for their sake, you should keep yourself healthy. Give yourself some rest now. You’ve wandered around so much, spent so much time chatting—now settle down a bit. You must think about yourself and your family. If you fall sick, none of those people you worry about outside your family will think about you. That’s what I felt, so I said it. If my words sound like advice to you, then so be it—that’s what they are.
I was feeling awful, that’s why I called you. You could have spared me that contempt and dismissal. I don’t have the strength to endure mockery like you do, so I spoke up. You may not like me at all, I might not even be worthy of your fingernail, but you didn’t have to speak to me that way. Do you really enjoy treating people badly? Have you ever tried restraining that urge to be cruel, to see how it feels? It feels wonderful, truly! You can try it!
How are you doing?
This boy! What are you up to?
Do you eat hand-roasted puffed rice or machine-made? If you have the hand-roasted kind, you won’t need Sprite with it.
Have you ever tried mustard flower fritters? You should try them, you’ll like them. Mix chanachur with milk tea and eat it—that’s quite a delicious combination too.
Hey hey hey hey hey!! Instead of spending so much time on Facebook, give yourself some time, won’t you! Even a madman understands what’s good for him! But you don’t seem to understand! Why don’t you understand? What kind of madness is this!
Take a good look at yourself!
Did you offer prayers during Saraswati Puja? Today you’re supposed to bathe with raw turmeric paste. Did you do it?
Have you forgotten me? I called you this morning.
Mother has made rice cakes and cooked sweet rice pudding. You’re invited. I’ve also cooked something special. I won’t tell you what it is. It’s a surprise!
This boy… hmm, Yamini Babu,
I’m talking to you—why all these airs? Such rotten pretensions! What a disgusting smell! Just looking at it makes me sick! Ugh, such affectation. Where did you learn to put on such airs, being a man! It doesn’t suit you at all. Drop all these pretenses while there’s still time! You go overboard in everything. Why do you cut the call when I phone? Good Lord, you’re busy—not just I, but the whole world knows that. The moment someone calls, your attitude soars as high as Mount Everest’s peak, doesn’t it? Pack all your airs in your laptop bag and store them in the wardrobe. You know what I think? I think fourteen-sixteenths of everything you write about yourself on Facebook is complete lies. Otherwise, by now I would have married you seven times over and become a great-grandmother too. It’s all just a scheme to get likes. What will you do with so many likes—tell me, let me make my ears worthwhile by listening.
What’s so special about Facebook,
tell me! All day long it’s just Facebook
and more Facebook. If I were your wife, I would have smashed your phone to pieces on our wedding day itself. Though
if the phone is your hobby, I wouldn’t break it. This is no less than a co-wife! Such a worthless thing. You’re thinking,
who is this girl from nowhere,
no beauty or virtue to speak of,
and she dreams of being
my wife! Goodness! What a handsome, accomplished man
has graced us! You’re not even a bit handsome. A pale beanpole! I’m a thousand
times more beautiful than you. And as for virtues, you have none at all. Having a job certainly doesn’t count as a virtue. You probably know only that one song, and even that goes off-tune sometimes. A hairless mouse. I hope you know what a hairless mouse is.
Your two big ears, that enormous nose—
just looking at it makes me want to
take a good bite out of it. Why do you pose for pictures like a girl? Such terrible style! I’m already laughing thinking
about how you’d look in a dhoti.
You’d look like a scarecrow. A dhoti-wearing scarecrow. Hee hee, if they stood you up in a
rice field, I’m sure not a single bird or beast would dare come near.
You monkey! Oh, what virtues do you have,
let me hear a bit… Can you cook? Even if you can,
you can’t cook better than me. You can recite poetry, can you? Then let’s have a competition between you and me!
I’ve never even learned it by mistake. Never listened to anyone else’s either. I can do it all by myself. I understand poetry,
take it to heart, then recite it.
Why am I thinking so much
about you, tell me! Ugh!
A person devoid of beauty and virtue,
and yet why I love you,
I don’t understand myself! Mother says
my taste is apparently quite terrible,
after falling in love with you
I realized mother speaks the truth. When will you
get married, tell me! Your age is no longer
that young! If I marry you, people will say I’ve married an old man. Doesn’t matter! I’ll say, marriage is a matter of fate, no one has control over that, but this old man loves me dearly! Hearing this, everyone will
envy me. You’re laughing hard, aren’t you! You’re thinking,
is she crazy! Why would I go and marry
such a witch-like girl out of sheer misery!? If I just say the word, beautiful women would line up.
Goodness! Beautiful women have nothing better to do than marry an old monkey like you!
Listen here sir, you know so many things,
but do you know how to love?
I’m telling you I’m ready to agree. Ugh! I can’t stand all this pretense anymore! Looking for a tall, beautiful girl, are you! Why, I ask you! Do you have betel nut and coconut trees at home that you need a tall wife to pluck coconuts and betel nuts from the trees?! All this nonsense! If I had you in front of me, I’d bite your nose! You rat, you cat, you monkey! And don’t you dare think I speak improperly! If I scold you in proper language, it wouldn’t be a proper scolding anymore. You are a selfish person. You only understand your own needs, nobody else’s. After marriage, I’ll cure you of this selfishness. You are a pompous, know-it-all sort of person. You think you know everything, more than everyone else………..that’s completely wrong, sir! You actually know nothing at all. You just pretend to know. I don’t know anything either. Don’t want to know. But this much I know—you know nothing. You’re a lonely person, and after marriage I won’t let you stay alone anymore. Even if you want to. You’re thinking, marrying the girl I’ve already told I don’t love! Well, try loving me a little! You won’t be able to look at anyone else then! If you’re calculating by age, thinking she’s just a silly young girl, how can I love her! Then I’ll say you have no right to love at all! Love doesn’t have all these calculations, sir! I can love tremendously. You don’t even have the capacity to imagine how much. What happens if you love a little, tell me! Well, can you even love, or is your heart completely empty!
I irritate you, don’t I? Should I not irritate you—should I pamper you instead! You monkey! I’ll irritate you even more! There, I’m being affectionate……..affection, affection! From tomorrow you’ll call me, and when I call you’ll answer in a sweet voice and talk to me; forget scolding—if you hang up on me I’ll bite your nose. I’ll set loose ants and their nests all over you. Remember that! You scarecrow…….making all those faces!
Do whatever you want. But I’m telling you seriously, you’re a scarecrow, a naked rat, a monkey, a bear, a langur, a devil, Satan! Still, I’m going to marry you and only you. Got it?
Listen, boy! Be warned! Don’t you dare write my name anywhere! If people find out you talk to me, they’ll make me a celebrity! I don’t want that. What else can you do besides writing notes, tell me? You can’t even love me a little. From now on you’ll love me, only me, or I’ll bite your nose. You palm tree. Ma sometimes grows vegetables on our roof—after marriage I’ll sometimes dress you in a dhoti, turn you into a scarecrow and make you stand in the sun on the roof. I’m not telling you these things to make you laugh. You are what you are, and I’ve only told you exactly that. Now quickly tell me, “Girl, I love you!” Otherwise I’ll bite you! I’ll tear your hair out, punch your belly and burst it!
I’ll call you at night. If you hang up or don’t answer, you’ll be in trouble. I’m very hot-tempered, you know………..
Just marry me
once, then you’ll see—
you won’t be able to go anywhere near Facebook, even by mistake. You’ll just sit there and
look at me all day long………..Hey you! I do love you, I’m telling the truth! What terrible
harm would come to you if you loved me just a little bit! Can’t you love me even a tiny bit!
Last night too I
saw you in my dreams. What I saw, I can’t
tell you before marriage. I’ll tell you after. Why I can’t tell you, that also I can’t say—I’ll tell you that after marriage too. You sir are very wicked.
You’re plotting to turn my feelings into notes. What a scheming, awful person!
Hey you! You hung up
on me again! You really have some nerve! I’m going to bite you for real! Then you’ll know
what fun is! Is your nose more precious, or is talking
too much trouble? What happens if you talk
a little!
Hey hey hey hey hey
hey hey heyyyyyyyyy………………
You’re very bad.
Very! You can’t even love yourself properly, how will you love me? You’re all style on the outside, all
substance there—but inside
you’re completely hollow! What a pity!
So it would be easier
for you to hang up on me, that’s why the other day
you said you’d save my number, right? Oh my! How clever!
You really are
awful! Such a terrible person! You don’t answer the phone, and when you do answer you don’t talk! What’s the point of answering the phone and then just
leaving it there? Did you think I’d be too embarrassed to call again? Oh brother, I threw shame and modesty to the wind when I fell in love with you! Don’t you get it, dear fellow?
Don’t have the courage
to say anything, boy? Well I say everything! I want to torment you!
I’ll torment you
more………….
Rotten boy!
Scarecrow,
palm tree, naked mouse, monkey, cat, ape, bear!
From now on I’ll
torment you even more……..much more!
From now on
I’ll call you every single day……..let’s see how long you can avoid me!
Hmm! I’m not pretty,
I’ve known that since I was little. You didn’t have to put it that way. Though actually, you did well to say it. Thank you, boy! You really are wonderful! Even if your cruelty makes me cry myself to death, I’ll still love only you!
Since I possess
the looks of a witch, it’s my duty as a witch to torment you. I’m not going to stop tormenting you, I absolutely won’t!
Muahahahahaha………
Hello! How are
you? Do you think I’ve forgotten
you? I’m tormenting you a bit less for now, but that doesn’t mean
I won’t torment you anymore. Hehehehehe…….you scarecrow!
You look like an
alien in your new photos. Hehehehehe…..
How are you?
Are you well? I miss you sometimes. My heart gets sad
now and then maybe, so maybe that’s why I miss
you.
This
boy………how are you?