Habituation

You give no time,
no reply,
no love,
no attention.

None of this angers me anymore.
That you give nothing at all—what's new in that!

Everything's fine, now do something else;
something new, because your neglect, your lovelessness...all of it
has become second nature to me;
along with that, all the expectations
born around love
I've shaken off.

The feelings of pain don't really come anymore. They truly don't.

Now that nothing you do causes me even the slightest pain,
I don't want to let you know this,
thinking you might feel bad
seeing that I'm not suffering!

So sometimes when pain used to come,
and you'd understand from seeing my hurt that I loved you,
even if I have to force it,
I keep up the act
of being in pain.

If someday you realize
that I no longer hurt for you or thinking of you,
then perhaps you might also think
that I probably don't love you anymore.

Love to me now is just a word.
It no longer stirs my heart.

With some well-arranged sorrows, I'm doing quite well!

For me now, need is greater than love;
far greater still...life is greater!