(I’ve shared roughly 30% of what I said at the Career Talk held on 31/10/2015 at Begum Rokeya University, Rangpur.)
Disclaimer:
There are a few human attitudes that have irritated me more than anything else in this life, and one of them is: the careerist attitude.
So when you see the title “Career Talk,” please don’t take it to mean a gathering for becoming a careerist. Understanding what I want to say here—and what I don’t—will become clear.
Job for life! NOT, Life for job!!
Career Talk
Sushanta Pal
Assistant Commissioner
Customs, Excise & VAT Commissionerate, Khulna
Come, let’s dream!
Let’s take a walk around the man of one’s dreams…………….. (Video clip)
During the talk……..
Your phones must not ring, under any circumstances.
If you need to speak with the person next to you, slip in your words when I’m not looking your way.
If you feel sleepy, sleep in such a way that it doesn’t disturb the person beside you. Don’t let your shoulder drop onto theirs as you doze off.
Ask questions only when I invite you to.
You don’t need to take notes—just listen. I’ll share everything on Facebook. My Facebook ID: Sushanta Paul
These things matter…….
A few words…………
Quota: Someone else’s beautiful wife! And she’s not mine………
BCS: ‘A cesspool of corruption’
BCS officer: A willing surrender of freedom for a salary
You don’t want to study, but you want to be a BCS cadre == You want to hear “mother,” but you don’t want to marry. Legally impossible! Sorry!
“Good job”……. It’s an oxymoron!! “There is no pure job in this world.”
A Nobody’s Story
Looking back. The story of remaining a nobody. The story of the boy with the worst results; the one who wasn’t supposed to even complete his honors degree, the one nobody ever dreamed of. A story of life’s direction changing again and again. The story of a happy unsuccessful accidental engineer who didn’t live out someone else’s life, who didn’t compromise with life; the story of a disillusioned entrepreneur. How does it feel when money earned through hardship flows away like water!!
Identity is more important than existence! Not being acknowledged by anyone—that’s a terrible, devastating kind of pain.
The story of quitting tutoring. Most people study while also tutoring on the side. But I tutored while studying—not out of necessity, but obsession. Later, I wondered: what does tutoring really give us? Money and disdain, mostly; sometimes, respect. The greatest joy lies in doing what others think you cannot do. Here lies a profound conflict in the life of the Bengali middle class: which matters more—the soul or the job?
Days of humiliation, nights of tears. No one tells you, “You’ve fallen—that’s fine, get back up!” Everyone just lectures. How does someone live when no one wants them? The cruelest sight in this world: your parents’ tears, and knowing you caused them.
The weight of poison, and what comes after. Merely surviving is enough; why not try living a little? To take the life your mother gave you and destroy it with your own hands—that is a grave sin! Better to be a completely unremarkable person than to fail at being brilliant like ten others. Have you read the tales of the swimmer and the water sprite?
Suffering is better than having nothing at all. Life of Penance… Cry, cry, only to smile better. What does “doing something good” mean? It means doing what lights up the faces of your parents and those close to you, what makes them hold their heads high. That is doing something good.
When a person’s back is against the wall, they turn and fight. My back was lodged against that wall. I would look at everyone’s face like a beggar, hungry for a single kind word. Nobody said, “You can do this too.”
The story of an iftar party. The story of a get-together. Hidden within every insult is an opportunity.
I am deeply happy because I did not get what I asked for. Sometimes God answers our prayers by not answering them. Thank God He did not grant the prayers of my early years. There is always enough time to understand that things are delayed.
Why doesn’t every prayer get answered? What is the mystery behind it? We are all merely part of a vast masterpiece!
What is a career? Why? When?
The career of a happy cleaner… Before you begin your career, ask yourself: what do you love? Others cannot answer that for you. They can only tell you, at best, what you should love. The real trouble with thinking like everyone else is this: you cap yourself at a predetermined level, and your achievement becomes something unremarkable, something you cannot point to and say, “This is mine.” Will you let your life sink into the ordinary, or won’t you? That choice is yours.
Those of you here, those who haven’t even started a career yet—are you truly behind? What does “being behind” even mean? The story of hearing about the BCS exam. I started working at least 4.5 years after my friends.
What is a career? What makes a “good” career—whether in a job or in business? I believe there are three things.
Social recognition
Solvency
Time to spend your earning in your own way
I’d rather live a brief life as a sparrow without regret than linger for years amid abundance, sighing. Yes, you can run the rat race just like everyone else does—scurrying to win, only to remain a rat. But here lies the trouble. First: this race never ends. Second: even if you win it, you remain a rat at the finish. And the problem with being a rat is that rats can’t truly live a human life. How much does a job really give us? We never know what comes first in our lives—tomorrow? Or the next life? So when choosing a career, we must keep one thing in mind: to live life on our own terms before death comes calling.
Career and family—the story of filling a glass jar.
I had no aim in life, except on exam papers. Someone once asked me about my plans for the next ten years—regarding life and career. I told them: I’ve never even managed to plan ten minutes of my life. Still, I’m happy. No regrets! How much can one person truly have in one lifetime? I’m someone who lives in the present moment, minute by minute. What’s the point of being so caught up in career?
The great irony of modern life: we give our boss more time than our spouse. We wish our boss a happy holiday before we wish it to our family.
Life Lessons
I try to follow certain principles. Let me share some of them:
One. Sleep for no more than six hours a day on average. It’s not about the quantity; sleeping well is what matters. Always keep your phone silent and your laptop away when you sleep.
Two. Write down in your phone’s drafts or in a notebook all the good thoughts and ideas that come to you at various moments. Usually, beautiful thoughts don’t come twice.
Three. Every day, spend thirty minutes reading a motivational book or listening to a lecture. During this time, set your ego aside.
Four. If your mind ever becomes deeply restless and nothing seems to calm it, take a ten-minute walk and count your steps. Or do this instead: empty your mind completely of all thoughts and sit silently for ten minutes, gazing at the sky. You can read Vivekananda’s letters or Tagore’s Chinnopatra, or listen to Rabindra Sangeet. Your mind will find peace.
Five. Every morning when you wake, spend ten minutes writing down what you need to do that day. Keep the paper with you. Write down at least one task you didn’t do the day before. Before sleep, check if you’ve accomplished everything on your list.
Six. Avoid the company of fools, or better yet, inspire those around you toward better things. The work habits and success patterns of your friends profoundly shape who you become. The more foolish your husband, the greater the risk your future children will inherit that same foolishness. A foolish husband poses far greater danger to a family than a foolish wife. I watched my father from childhood—whenever he was absorbed in his work, he was content. From that observation alone, I learned that happiness lives within engagement. What you absorb from your family is not easily unlearned. So do not create patterns in your own household that will teach your next generation to think and act the same way.
Seven. When a task must be done, approach it with stubborn determination. See it through to the end before you let it go.
Eight. Free yourself from the habit of treating someone as essential to your life when they do not treat you as essential to theirs. If someone breathes well without you, there is no sense in holding your breath until you die for them. The more you feel for someone indifferent to you, the more they will savor that twisted victory. The art of forgetting the wrong person is a profound one. It matters little how long you stood beside them; what matters is how thoroughly you can delete them from your life going forward. That is the real measure.
Nine. Cultivate the habit of reading quickly. Learn to skim over what is unnecessary. Mark the essential passages and read them again and again until they are photographed into your mind. This will cut down the time you spend on the task of reading.
Ten. Look at your present circumstances. You will see that by the grace of the Creator, you have been spared from many dangers and misfortunes, and that you are well. Before you sleep each night, offer your gratitude. Do not sleep without it. Gratitude brings respect, mental strength, and peace.
Eleven. Read various motivational books—The Secret, Outliers, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, The Power of Now, The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari, You Can Win, and others. Read the biographies of great people, again and again. Read The Prophet, the Bhagavad Gita, and various spiritual texts with feeling and belief. When reading such books, you must read with faith. If you subject everything in this world to logic alone, living here will become difficult. Yet from these books, take only what you need. Choose what serves you.
Twelve. Fast at least two days a month. Fasting strengthens the mind and teaches you compassion and humility.
Thirteen. Keep at least one good book in your bag, and read whenever you have the chance. You can also keep books on your phone in PDF form.
Fourteen. Help or forgive at least one person every day. This will deepen your respect for yourself. Respect yourself above all else.
Fifteen. Once a week, stand on your porch and watch the dawn break. It will help clarify your thoughts.
Sixteen. Here’s a simple truth: avoid the company of those who don’t respect others. There’s little worth learning from arrogant people.
Seventeen. Build a wall around yourself. Within that sheltered space, give yourself ample time to do your work in your own way. This allows you to accomplish more than others in the same stretch of time. If you give yourself to everyone, you won’t be able to do your own work properly.
Eighteen. Before you go to bed each night, read at least thirty pages from a good book. Spare the time you spend on Facebook for reading instead. Keep company with people who read. There’s no point in falling in love with someone who doesn’t read books. But if you’ve already fallen for them, teach them to love reading.
Nineteen. Spend less time with people of lesser wit and intelligence than yourself. But never wound them with your words. A single conversation with a truly intelligent person is worth reading twenty books. Better to be alone than to waste time with the wrong people.
Twenty. Every day, push yourself to do a little more than you think you can. When you’ve done that extra work well, reward yourself with something you want, or do something you love.
Twenty-One. One day each week, turn off your watch and your phone. Spend time entirely as you wish. Cut yourself off completely from the world for that day, and do all those things you love but never get to because of your busy life.
Twenty-Two. When a twisted or negative thought enters your mind, don’t try to push it out; instead, step away from it yourself.
Twenty-Three. Your phone was made for you, not for others. Be selective about which calls you take. Most calls don’t matter and only waste your time. If you already know—or sense—that a call will upset you, don’t answer it unless it’s essential.
Twenty-Four. Write down ten good qualities of someone you admire or respect. Then believe that those same qualities exist within you, and practice cultivating them, no matter how difficult. Mimic them. Work in the same style they do. Try this for two weeks, and you’ll see a transformation in yourself.
Let’s meet the best guitarist @ Harvard!! (video clip)
Twenty-five. Now and then, listen to soft melodies—Oriental or Western instrumentals; through headphones or alone in a quiet room. Watch some good films. Study some masterpiece paintings. And on a piece of paper, write down what you felt after listening to the music or watching the films and paintings. Share this with friends on Facebook.
Twenty-six. Before others do it, occasionally mock your own shortcomings in public. This will increase your control over yourself.
Twenty-seven. Every day, do two things you don’t enjoy doing. Even if they annoy you while you’re doing them, don’t stop. Start reading a book you know you should read but have no desire to. Or call someone you need to call but keep putting off. Or clean the bathroom. This will build your capacity to push through discomfort. Most people give up after thirty seconds; if you can stick with something for at least twenty-two minutes, you’ll be ahead of everyone else—that’s the difference that matters.
Twenty-eight. Spend more time with people who are the kind of person you want to become. You can’t lose weight by hanging around people who love eating.
Twenty-nine. Once a day, stay silent for thirty minutes straight. Don’t speak to anyone during that time. It’s even better if you can close your eyes and relive a cherished memory—a past success or a moment of joy. This builds mental strength.
Thirty. Often ask yourself: if I died right now, who beyond my family would mourn me? Think about what you can do to increase that number—and then do it.
Thirty-one. You have only two options: either stay up late at night, or wake before dawn. If you genuinely can’t be alone at night, choose the second. Most people stay awake late, wasting time in idle talk. If you can wake before dawn, no one will bother you—there’s nothing for you to do but work and study.
Thirty-two. Whatever we accomplish, if it’s truly significant, it’s almost certainly the result of at least ten thousand hours of work over ten years. No one in this world achieves anything worthwhile overnight.
Thirty-three. Don’t suddenly throw yourself into hard work without thinking. First, understand what you need to do and what you don’t. Then work—not just hard, but truly hard.
Thirty-four. No one becomes a hero out of nothing in this world. You have to decide: in what field do you want to be a hero? Time spent on something that doesn’t interest you, or that you don’t value, is simply time wasted. What you invest your time in today will be what sets you apart from others tomorrow—that’s your signature.
Thirty-five. Intelligence and achievement don’t always walk hand in hand. It’s not a rule written in stone that the smarter you are, the further you’ll go. Among all the top-scoring students from schools, colleges, and universities, only twenty percent make it to the list of the great. The other eighty percent come from those no one ever dreamed about. So fight with yourself till the last drop of blood.
Lessons from life …….
The day you’re longing for—the one nobody remembers—that very day could turn out to be the best day of your life! The story of deactivating your Facebook account on your birthday.
A single second, one piece of good news can turn the course of your life around. A strange moment can erase all your previous suffering. God never leaves anyone dishonored forever. Wait with humility for that day of dreams and believe from your heart—it will come. It must come.
Just one mistake can shove you hard in the forward direction. Making that kind of mistake is itself a stroke of luck. Making mistakes early in life is the best thing you can do.
Intellectual humility is essential. Why Google doesn’t care about hiring top college graduates? Those who aren’t used to making mistakes can’t go very far.
Own up to the mistake—it’s yours. Forgive everyone else but yourself.
Stop chasing perfection. If you keep doing what you’ve always done, you’ll stay exactly where you’ve always been. There’s no such thing as perfect in this world.
Whether you graduated from Oxford, MIT, Stanford, or Harvard—nobody really cares. In the end, it’s only your impressive behavior, your manners, the way you speak that lingers in people’s minds. Nothing else.
Most people love success but secretly detest the successful person. Not everyone will like you. To survive in this world, you don’t need everyone’s approval. You need some enemies in your life. If you don’t have any, create some. Experience teaches us that birds of the same feather feel jealous of each other. Those who are after you have already admitted it to themselves—you’re ahead.
Doing something well matters far more than doing it fast. People remember how well the work was done, that’s all. Don’t make easy things complicated, and don’t underestimate the difficult ones.
“Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” Saying someone’s face is ugly doesn’t make my face any more beautiful.
There are two ways to grow big. One: become bigger yourself. Two: make others smaller. The second one’s easier, but risky. Why?
It’s better to be a follower of the wise than a friend of the foolish on Facebook. Stay humble and keep learning. You can’t learn without humility. Losing once against a lion is far better than winning a hundred times against a donkey.
The power of silence outweighs the power of speech. If you wish to make someone hear you, don’t do it with words—do it with your actions. Your day will come. Until then, let people talk. Your actions talk the loudest!
Do three things.
One. Write down what you want to do.
Two. Write down how you’ll do it.
Three. Keep what you’ve written where your eyes can find it. ………. When will you start doing this? Today itself, the moment you get home!!
Love your emotions. Your hands may be less beautiful than someone else’s. But without them, you are incomplete—just as you are incomplete without your emotions. People live through their feelings.
Why me? There’s no point asking that question. There’s a priest’s story. There’s Caroline’s story. There’s your own: Have you never received an honor you didn’t deserve? What goes around, comes around. The world runs on balance. You’ve scraped by with passing grades in so many of life’s tests. Why break your heart over failing one? Come on! F is just a grade! Never let it define you!!
Focus on the rabbit you want to get. If needed, change the tactics, but don’t change the rabbit. If what you’re chasing feels too difficult, then change the path you’re walking, not the destination. Half of what you think is right about your effort probably is.
What’s essential to winning? Talent? Skill? Knowledge? No, none of those. You need two things. Passion and perspective. The footballer’s story. My students’ stories. Stories of little children. The story of going two nights without sleep.
From today on, whenever you watch football or cricket, imagine yourself in that player’s place. What would you do? Practice this.
Fear is only as fearsome as we let it be. The story of being afraid of cockroaches as a child. The bumblebee’s story. What happens when you look down from the top of a mountain?
When you’re to look through the window, just look through, don’t look at.
The story of pessimists. Pessimism itself is contagious.
Spend more time with those who speak well of you and believe in your abilities. When someone praises you, harness the sense of responsibility it awakens within. Samar sir’s story. Every husband tries to do more of what his wife appreciates. The opposite works just as well. Use this in your own life. Listen to praise with humility; give it with generosity.
Be a 2-dollar man.
Sometimes a goalkeeper standing still, barely moving left or right, concedes fewer goals than one who runs about frantically. Why does the goalkeeper run? Because we believe, at least he tried. Even when a goal goes in, no one blames him quite as harshly. Stop worrying so much about what others think.
Eat that frog! The formula goes like this: before you sit down to study, write out everything you need to cover that day. Finish the hard, tedious subjects first. Once you’ve conquered those, the easier material will fly by. Get your priorities straight. When you finish tackling one difficult subject, reward yourself with something. Every now and then, give yourself permission to slack off. Close the door to your room. Turn the music up full volume and dance! What else is there in life!
Stress Management
The story of Sachin Tendulkar.
The Main Khelega Attitude! (Video Clip)
To become someone great in life, you need that habitual ‘selfish’ weakness transformed into greatness. When we diminish a great person, it says nothing about them—it speaks volumes about us. Seeing Humayun Ahmed not as a writer but as Shaon’s husband is our own spiritual sickness. For your own sake, try to replicate the qualities of those who have succeeded in their fields. Whatever goal you’re chasing, hold it in profound reverence. Otherwise, your preparation will lack the sincerity it demands. God honors the humble.
Notice this: ninety-six percent of the world’s wealth is earned by just one percent of humanity. Among those who take the civil service exam, only one percent become cadres. Why? Some of it comes down to factors beyond our control. Don’t waste your energy on those. Focus on what you can control. Plan to be among that one percent! Don’t spend your days mourning the misfortune of the other ninety-nine.
A song gets stuck in your head once, and it just keeps playing, keeps playing. No matter what kind of song it is! Maybe it’s one so embarrassing you’d be mortified humming it aloud! When our brain receives a signal, it only cares about what our thoughts are transmitting back. Our brain works solely with keywords. Choose yours with great care. Like attracts like. Let me give you some real examples. “Saaiya dil mein aana re”……
Creating your own work environment. The examples of Humayun Ahmed and Sunil Gangopadhyay. The story of my poor friend.
Two small things need two hands. One large thing also needs two hands. If you can’t let go of small opportunities, the big ones will slip through your fingers. My own story. Live like the birds do. Leave to live.
When you’re working on something, follow the headlight theory of a car. If you think about everything that came before and everything that comes after—the whole sprawling context—your attention will scatter. Most people find the immediate task ahead daunting, so they prefer to dwell on things that are easy to think about, things that conveniently discourage them from doing the work right in front of them.
No One Kept Their Promise (Video Clip)
Doing something truly well does not require an abundance of time. To create something beautiful, emotion matters far more than labour or intellect. The art of accomplishing much in little time—that is a skill worth mastering. …… No one kept their word. You fill up my senses. Kumar Sanu at twenty-eight. A tale from Dostoevsky. …….. Be idle. The philosophy of Bill Gates.
There is a truth here that runs deep. Being a good student academically does not guarantee a flourishing career—life does not work that way. The strong academic performers often become easy targets in your eyes. Turn their weakness to your advantage. Aim for the last laugh. Let some of the middle stretch be consumed by tears, by neglect, by scorn.
Stop complaining the world is not fair. Yes, it’s not fair. And, this unfair world is older than you and has charmed many people much better than you.
There are two hardest stages in undertaking any task:
To settle in your mind what you truly wish to do, how you wish to do it, and why. To actually begin the work. The simplest technique for starting any task is simply to start it.
Is self-confidence necessary for success, or is success necessary for self-confidence? I cannot do it, I am helpless, I quit! The story of Shah Rukh Khan.
“It always seems impossible until it’s done.” The difficulty of most competitive examinations is greatly exaggerated. — Why? The ones who rank first in the civil service exam—they are human too, aren’t they? I used to think that way. ………. Do not tell yourself your BCS will not happen, your BCS will not happen. Your prayers may yet be answered.
Your passion pays!! Books, movies, music & of course Facebook!! No matter, whatever it is!! Basically, you were what you loved, you’re what you love, you’ll be what you’ll love!!
If you are not thinking about your dream, you are not thinking at all.
What good is asking Bill Gates about the rice-and-lentil trade? Be strategic.
Success cannot be deserved; it must be earned. When you succeed and later reflect in your heart on how much that is your own doing—in precisely the same way, when you fail, others secretly believe it is what you deserve. People assume you cannot do what they themselves cannot do, or are not accustomed to doing. There exist certain viruses among men—those incapable of ever praising another, or even tolerating another’s merit. Never let their words shake you. If someone cannot appreciate your right actions, they have no right to condemn your wrong ones. I despise critics more than anyone else. Cast them out from your life. It suits only them to be ruled…. Kind words are healthier than a bowl of chicken soup. The story of the strange dog.
Being known as a bright student from childhood is a peculiar curse — you can never again think of yourself as ordinary. The thought that others see you as mediocre, that you’re incapable of accepting this judgment, brings genuine pain. Sometimes it’s your bad luck! People want to see you as they want, not as you want to see yourself. Still, live in your own life. Don’t listen to others, listen to your heart.
Don’t be serious, be sincere. Not everyone can do everything, after all. Accept this. Find out which thing you do best, and do that.
Stop overthinking. “If you’re going through hell, keep going.” Que sera sera — Whatever was, was; whatever is, is; whatever will be, will be. What must happen will happen.
Life didn’t come to us with a user-manual. So, it’s our right to use and to abuse it! Sometimes, failures are just too good! To fail successfully is an art.
Deciding what you really want matters. Our problem is, we don’t know what we want. It took me almost 2 decades to decide what I really want. When I’d decided finally, it took me only a few months to get what I really want.
Don’t only work hard, also work smartly.
Only your results are rewarded, not your efforts. This is the way the world accepts or rejects you.
What is SUCCESS?? It’s not the opposite of failure as popularly believed, it’s just living without sighs. It’s just dancing in the manner you want and making people think you dance well even if you don’t. It’s making your style others’ favourite brand even if it’s foolish. It’s sometimes making people laugh listening to your even worst jokes. It’s making others hear you even when you don’t speak. It’s taking the opportunity to tell others that meeting your previous millionth failure was essential, anyway. It’s making your failures worth-mentioning by you or by others. It’s living in your own way and let others live in their own ways.
IBA Admission Tests and BCS Exams
DOs & DON’Ts
The difficulty level of BCS and IBA admission tests has always struck me as somewhat overblown. Yes, they are competitive exams — that much is true — but here’s what’s even truer: among those who actually sit for these tests, genuinely prepared candidates are far fewer than people imagine. Most people simply prefer to spread fear about these two exams rather than speak honestly. They talk about what they know and what they don’t know alike. Let me share two facts.
About fifty percent of the candidates who appear for these exams show up just to have a look around, for no real reason — it’s more like a social gathering, really. (Funny thing is, some of them end up succeeding anyway! The whole “I came, I saw, I conquered” sort of thing! There’s no point in feeling hurt by their success.)
Only about 7% of candidates are truly competitive.
What this means is that your competition isn’t as formidable as you imagine. The BCS and IBA entrance exams have no fixed syllabus, so complete preparation for either is simply impossible. Here’s what matters: to study perfectly and then forget sixty percent of it, yet use the remaining forty percent wisely—that’s the art. For these two exams, knowing what to study is far less important than deciding what to leave out. That’s where the real strategy lies.
I’ve tried to address this in the slides that follow. Use this guideline in your own way. Take what you need, and discard the rest.
By the way, he is joining the IPS! (video clip)