Beyond Twilight

One. That day, even amid a thousand souls, I couldn't speak the simple truth simply: you are woven into every fiber of my being. Try as I might, I couldn't confess that I have always wanted to hide time in the folds of skin only when I'm with you.

My list of failures just keeps growing!

You know, the way vines and creepers cling to mountainsides—that's how I wrap myself in your memories and become primitive, bit by bit. Waiting for you, I smear history across my skin.

Just the other day, at sunset, warm breezes carried that earthy fragrance everywhere. They said it comes from rain's tears on the soil's breast, but all I could think was—this is the scent of your tears!

Were you crying that day? Do you remember me, then?

You once said that when darkness comes, you disappear somewhere. Every night I become the city's last neon glow, spreading myself across your window—don't you sense it? Why do I lose you even when I become light? Can you tell me?

Perhaps I still haven't learned to express love, whether deep or shallow. Otherwise, why would all those written letters gather dust in my breast pocket? So many others trample dew to write "I love you" on grass blades! I couldn't even manage that.

Only I remain unable to speak, and so each day my pile of failures touches the sky. Maybe that's why even the dewdrops fade away in sulking! Are you, then, winter's dew?


Two. I have watched myself embrace death. That death—clear as seawater! Beneath the water lies a rocky abyss. To hide those limestone monsters and giant stones, seaweed nets spread everywhere. There, ruby fish, blue-stripe snappers, and cnidarians play hide-and-seek behind sargassum's tangled hair. Ah! How beautiful!

I see how the sun's fractured light moves through those depths with such artistry, and... and... the moment it crosses the euphotic boundary, the ocean twilight swallows it whole!

I have tried countless times to save that light. But I couldn't scatter light through twilight into midnight! How many times I've returned with handfuls of light... couldn't... couldn't capture even a drop. Each time light slipped through my fingers, dissolved in clear water, yet that water couldn't penetrate the twilight!