Beloved Sulk

 Only after giving you back did I realize how deeply I loved you!
 Only after you left did I realize how completely you could forget me!
  
 Have you truly forgotten? Or is this merely wounded pride? Even in your hurt, bind yourself to love! Think of me and smile a little, even in silence!
 I love you! Because I love you, I no longer wish to possess! What I have already received—why should I ask for it anew?
  
 All of this life's achievements I would sacrifice in this very moment if I could truly have you back! I didn't understand you then, and you don't understand me now. Is this what we call reckoning? You are the regret of my entire life!!
  
 That day I couldn't defy circumstances, so I lost you.
 Today I'm willing to defy life itself, yet still I cannot have you back.
 This is what we call living!
  
 Ah, if only it could be so—even kissing death's lips, I could see that you had become mine again, just as before!...Even if I died right now, my age would remain fixed at twenty-five in your eyes! Isn't that so? Tell me?
 In your child's eyes, thinking of me each day, draw a kiss for me. Will you? Search for me in those very eyes. Will you search?
 Stay well, my dearest regret!