Being Alone

I have learned something else.

A person can be alone if they choose to be. Alone in the truest sense. It's possible to live without father, mother, family, friends, romance, love. When being with someone causes discomfort that persists, yet you can't speak your truth aloud—such a person remains distant even when close, a stranger even when they're your own. Solitude isn't an occasion for death, but for living.

Being born human means needing human company—that much is true. But when relatives, lovers, or anyone in any relationship uses that bond to destroy your confidence, wraps you in negativity, judges you, spreads lies behind your back, and strikes precisely where it will hurt most—when they do all these things, I think their absence would change nothing, would actually be a blessing.

Whom do we give our time to, whose time do we seek; whom do we keep in our thoughts, in whose thoughts do we wish to dwell; whom do we value, from whom do we expect value; whose words or actions hurt us, whose pain we care about—in all these choices, so much is revealed. These are the invisible records of our laughter and tears.

When you are alone, is there truly no one with you? Of course there is! You are with yourself then, with the person inside you. You converse with them, you can be exactly as you are. What could be more sorrowful than someone who is utterly alone even when alone!

What does this mean? When someone can speak without calculation, when being with them—talking or sitting in silence—causes not the slightest discomfort, when you can rest easy and unburdened without a second thought, someone who understands and whom you enjoy understanding, who never judges but only feels and tries to comprehend, someone you can be with without doubt or fear, to whom you can tell everything without hesitation and from whom you can hear everything without anxiety, someone from whom you need not hide yourself and who need not play such games of hide-and-seek with you—being with such a person is like being with your own soul. With such a person, you discover very clearly the beauty of being alone, of being with yourself.

Those who must be alone are fortunate. Sorrow overwhelms only those who cannot even be with themselves as they truly are. Solitude is beautiful, if your soul awakens there.