Before Being Bound in Prayer

 In this life, searching for nectar—
 so many eyes have burned.
 How many arms and lips I've touched in search of nectar, kept no count!
 Like a demon lusting for immortality, I've struck blows at heaven's gate,
 seeking the fragrance of nectar in the curve of your arms.
 What was mine to find, I found that much.
 O my beloved,
 poison in this chest, poison on these lips too,
 search my body and you'll find only fire!
 Better you stay distant—this much I understand.
  
 What traces remain,
 groping for them you'll find many signs of greed,
 or hatred mixed with desire.
 Leaving you behind to seek nectar, I've filled this heart with venom,
 the more I've wasted under the weight in my chest, the more I've remembered you.
 I feel such longing to set fires!
 Don't kindle this wound with love!
 Bind me to you in burning,
 hold me to you in my burning.
 Come, come let us burn again as before!
  
 Do feelings live in the brain?
 Then why, tell me, do these feelings flutter their wings in this ribcage?
 Pain or joy—everything, I see, seeks the ribs!
 Why so much ache? Stories, laments?
 Look at them all—how terribly healthy they seem!
 I might as well go mad!
 Give me love, drive me mad,
 pour nectar and catch me in madness!
  
 Whenever you say—I love you,
 consciousness awakens,
 sorrow flies somewhere into the wind,
 spring breeze brings storms in its veil!
 Whenever you say—I love you,
 this heart prepares itself for prayer,
 the birds of grief fly away, calling out—
 be well...!
  
 Whenever you say—I love you,
 old ailments flee for their lives,
 I gather your scent from the air,
 scatter your dreams across the sky,
 dawn breaks, I bow with tender grass in hand.
 Whenever you say—I love you,
 quietly I whisper—I love you, I love you, I love you...
 only you!
  
 Each time I've fallen in love,
 that many times I've surrendered my heart,
 each time I've drawn near,
 I've searched for myself constantly.
 Sometimes in the corner of your eyes,
 sometimes in the shyness of paired lips,
 sometimes I've sought myself in your hair, beloved,
 sometimes in your dress, in the pleats of your sari.
  
 Each time I've loved you well,
 that many times I've opened my ribs,
 bound you to my own heart,
 carefully tended you with the rope of my own love.
 However true your heart,
 know this love to be equally true.
 Loving you, I've found life—in so many different forms!
  
 Today the wind scattered such fragrance,
 the sky awakened rhythm,
 two hands seem to spread like peacock feathers,
 gentle scent at the window.
 Evening has descended in the corner of the room,
 I've sent a letter through the clouds,
 friend, don't fall asleep,
 don't push away my hand carelessly,
 with new force, heart full of passion, I'll fly far away following my heart's desire.
  
 Friend, open your window,
 seek me in this blue night,
 I'll float like clouds in your lap,
 see how I'll soothe you with soft touch.
 I'll speak so many words silently,
 play in the sky, pluck strings,
 on the colorful thread of your laughter,
 I'll be bound, become a kite of joy.
  
 Let me tell you a story of heartbreak, listen...
 There was a kingdom, in that kingdom was a king, he had a little girl—terribly stubborn, would puff her cheeks at every word.
 When hurt, she'd redden her cheeks, purse her lips, and cry terribly.
 When royal duties ended and he returned home, the queen would say, your daughter is angry, hasn't eaten anything, now you handle her a bit...I can't anymore!
 Finding her father, she'd cry twice as hard and complain, mother only scolds, glares for no reason at all.
 The father would immediately scold the mother; seeing the mother's pretend sadness as real, the princess's anger would melt away.
 So much playfulness with the daughter, a lifetime of countless colors—evening would slip into night...in those days.
 That girl couldn't live without her father for even a moment.
 Heaven's joy descends to earth, even a cottage becomes a temple—if only parents are near.
 That little girl grew up. She still can't manage without her father...
 Yet she's learned to carry on, to swallow tears and stay alive—in this faith, this hope—that father will return someday!
  
 Listen, girl, I say—
 In the waiting you live by,
 I'll be companion to that waiting.
 In the faith you've bound your life to,
 bind me too to that faith.
 Some prayers become like love,
 some love becomes like prayer...
 You remain as my prayer,
 I'll stay as your love.
 In our prayers together,
 may the day's weariness end at night—
 this is my plea.
 Won't you keep it? Tell me, won't you keep it?